


Brilliance

by Seraina (seraina_doom)



Category: Phineas and Ferb
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Human, Human Perry the Platypus (Phineas and Ferb), M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Sign Language, Slow Burn, Supergenius Heinz
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-24
Updated: 2018-05-30
Packaged: 2018-11-18 12:07:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 21,898
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11290410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seraina_doom/pseuds/Seraina
Summary: Heinz Doofenshmirtz was the mysterious, reclusive, genius founder of the most innovative technology company in the world. He was also a single father, a billionaire, a survivor and a person of interest to the secret organization called O.W.C.A.Henry "Perry" Fletcher had a stellar military career up until he'd been wounded and lost the ability to speak. Newly drafted to the O.W.C.A., his first mission is to gather intelligence on the Doofenshmirtz brothers. Honestly it'd been easier to do his job when he wasn't living with his family, who had no idea what he's done for most of his career.Little do Heinz and Perry realize that their meeting will jumpstart a series of events that will change their lives forever.





	1. Picture Imperfect

**Author's Note:**

> This is something I've been toying around with on my hard drive for a while. I'm going to apologize in advance because the updates will be slow as I try to write this through to the end.

Vanessa cradled the old Fujifilm camera to her chest and made her way out of the dusty piles of parts and boxes to her dad’s workbench. She chewed her lip a little and watched him hunched over the weird thing he was working on. 

“Dad?” she was nine, too old to call him Daddy even though she knew he liked it when she called him those names. That was a power she would save, at least until Christmas.

“Yes my little Doonkelberry?” He didn’t look up from his work, but his hands did still, as much as they ever stilled. Her dad was always moving, thinking, doing something; she couldn’t remember a time when he was ever completely still.

“This camera won’t turn on. I think it needs charged.” She set the camera on the edge of the workbench.

He hooked his foot on the leg of the stool next to him and pulled it out for her. She climbed up and watched him take the camera in his large hands. He smiled a little, “I remember this,” then he pressed against a latch in the back and the back of the camera swung open. “You don’t turn it on, sweetie, it’s a manual camera.”

“What’s the door for?” She leaned in closer to inspect the small machine.

“That’s where the film goes. I think I have some laying around.” He half-rose off his own stool and surveyed the workshop. He walked over to a wall of cabinets and containers, drawers and doors. His right hand twitched as he counted from the left and down until he finally brushed the fingers of his left hand on one small and unassuming drawer. He scooped out several small cylinders and stuffed them in the pockets of his lab coat. One container fumbled out of his clumsy fingers and bounced on the floor, followed by three others that cascaded out of his grip.

Vanessa hopped down and scurried to help chase the curious things. Her dad was clumsy sometimes; she didn’t mind as long as he didn’t get that sad look on his face and say those German words that she didn’t know yet. She scooped the last of the things off the floor and held them up to him.

“Back to the workbench!” He smiled and nudged her along. 

Once they were both seated again, Vanessa watched the film being loaded into the camera. She absorbed every detail about the lens, aperture and shutter speed. He handed her the loaded camera back and told her to take enough pictures to fill up the roll. She smiled and wandered around the lab, trying out her new camera.

Vanessa sat in a beanbag in her corner of the when she heard her dad speaking to someone. She poked her head around the side of the bookshelf and saw her Uncle Roger looking down at her dad, who was still sitting at his workbench. Uncle Roger was okay, he was always nice to her, but he just never seemed to listen to anything she had to say. Maybe it was because he was the kind of adult that didn’t think kids had anything useful to say. Maybe that’s why her dad always looked mad around Uncle Roger.

“Heinz, don’t be foolish, you have to come! DEI is the main contributor; it would be embarrassing if you just didn’t show up!” Roger seemed upset.

“It is just a charity banquet, Roger. I am sure the board of Injured Infantrymen will understand if I decide to do some real work that actually benefits people rather than spend hours making pithy small talk with rich snobs.” Her dad stood up and stretched, arching his back and straightening up to be the same height as his brother.

“Which is why you should go, being as you’re the perfect person to show off exactly what someone can do with a little support,” Roger said in the way that made Vanessa think he was trying to get more dessert without eating his peas.

“I am not going to make a spectacle of myself just because you think it’s a good idea. Besides, I don’t have a babysitter for Vanessa on such short notice.” Vanessa smiled a little, glad that her dad would rather spend time with her. But ever since Mom left, it’s been just the two of them. And maybe he should do more stuff with adults instead of working alone in his lab or hanging out with her.

“Mother would be happy to…”

“No.” Her dad quickly put a stop to that thought and she danced a little from her hiding place. She hated going to Grandma’s apartment. It was smelly and boring and Grandma never listened to anything Vanessa said either. The old woman just sat in front of the TV, and if she did tell any stories about Gimmelshtump, they were always about Grandpa or Uncle Roger. 

“Well they can’t say that I didn’t try.” Uncle Roger left and Vanessa waited for her dad to calm down a little before she made her presence known again.

“Dad? Is it time to go home yet I’m hungry?” 

He looked over at the clock on the wall and his face softened. “Of course, we can pick up a pizza on the way.”

She always got pizza when Grandma or Uncle Roger stopped over. At least that was one good thing about it. 

It wasn’t until later, when she curled up on the couch watching cartoons that she thought to ask. “Dad? Why didn’t you want to go to Uncle Roger’s party?”

“Well first off, I’d have to wear a tuxedo and those are uncomfortable. And these parties don’t even have any food, just little trays of tiny snacks that aren’t even that good. It is for a good cause and I guess it would be a good idea to show my face in public every once in a while.” He rambled, he always rambled when he didn’t want to say what he was actually thinking.

“Well I could stay over at Lacey’s house if that’s okay.” She wanted to go to Lacey’s house for a sleepover forever, and Lacey’s mom said it was okay, she just needed Dad to agree too.

He seemed to think about it too much, so she gave him her puppy eyes. “ _Bitte Papa?_ ” She even begged him in German. He never refused her when she asked in German.

“ _Ja_ ,” he sighed, then reached over and ruffled her hair. “You can go have a slumber party with Lacey while I go to Uncle Roger’s boring party.”

“Thank you!” She reached up and hugged him. 

“Alright, well, it’s time to get ready for bed. Go get your PJs on and brush your teeth.” 

She hopped up and went to her room, putting on her favorite purple pajamas on and did a quick brushing of her teeth. Then she went to her dad’s room and sat on the edge of his bed kicking her feet while she waited. He came out of his bathroom wearing a t-shirt and a pair of plaid pants. He turned the bed down sat down beside her. 

“Alright sweetheart,” he held up his right arm towards her.

She ran her fingers up his arm until she felt the seam of where his prosthetic met skin and gave the arm a hard twist and pull and the heavy arm came off in her lap. She carried the arm over to the case on the low bench by the wall. She made sure it was lined up properly so that it would charge and smiled at the happy orange light that turned on. 

She sat on his other side and did the same to the left arm, twist, pull, charge. “What did you ever do without me?” She knew that he could put his arms on and take them off without help, but she liked helping. This was the one thing that nobody else ever did for him. It was special. 

He leaned forward, looking odd and skinny without his arms on and he kissed the top of her head. “Do you want me to tuck you in?”

“No, I’m too old for that. Night Dad.”

“Goodnight sweetheart.” 

Vanessa headed to her room and snuggled in her bed. She couldn’t wait to tell Lacey that their sleepover was finally going to happen. And she could show off her cool vintage camera. Her life might be a little weird compared to all the other kids at school, but she wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world.


	2. First Contact

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Perry embarks on his first mission with the O.W.C.A, wears a tuxedo and meets the most interesting man in the entire city.

Henry “Perry” Fletcher pulled on his collar and frowned, his sister-in-law tied the stupid bowtie too tight. He tried to ignore the choking sensation, knowing it was just all in his head. Why couldn’t he just wear his military uniform instead? But no, Major Monogram insisted that he not draw too much attention tonight. He was there to gather intelligence on the Doofenshmirtz brothers, make sure that they weren’t planning anything out of the ordinary.

“Perry! We’re going to be late if you don’t hurry up!” his brother Lawrence shouted up the stairs. He sighed and smoothed his teal hair down and accepted his fate even though he looked like a teal-haired penguin. This wasn’t his first assignment since he lost his voice, but it was his first mission with the O.W.C.A. and he didn’t want to make a bad impression.

He followed Linda down the stairs. When he saw Lawrence at the door, he took a deep breath and smiled. “ _I’m ready_ ,” he signed.

Linda turned to the three kids, Candace, Phineas and Ferb, “Be good for Becky. We’ll be home late so make sure to brush your teeth and go to bed.”

“Yes mom,” Candace and Phineas said while Ferb nodded. 

Perry ruffled the boys’ hair and signed a goodnight to them. In return, Ferb hugged his leg. He grinned and shook the boy off, making a shoo motion with his hands. His nephew had always been quiet, but since Perry started living with them, the boy stopped being as shy as he’d been when Lawrence first moved him to America.

He ran ahead and opened the back of the car and grinned. He didn’t mind playing chauffeur tonight, those two deserved a night out after all the hard work they put into the antiques shop they just opened. 

The drive over to City Hall wasn’t long, and once the car was left with the valet, the trio produced their tickets and stepped into the crowd of tuxes and gowns. Perry received his invitation for his mission, but the charity, giving medical aid and equipment to wounded soldiers was one his family fully supported. Linda always gave some of her song royalty money to charities like this one.

Roger Doofenshmirtz was easy to find. The handsome philanthropist was entertaining Danville’s elite with a strange story about his childhood in Drusselstein. The story didn’t seem to be going anywhere, so Perry hung back near an interesting piece of sculpture next to a slouching man that was nursing a drink of his own. 

“Of course, his childhood was all sunshine and kittens,” his companion grumbled and tossed back the rest of his champagne. “Roger the kickball star wouldn’t be able to fix a shaft belt if one slapped him on his ass.”

Perry looked the man over and recognized him as his other mark, Heinz. There was a slight family resemblance, but where Roger was Hollywood perfection, Heinz was all sharp and dangerous angles. Roger was the front then, Heinz must be the brains.

“Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to say all that out loud,” Heinz looked right at Perry. “I’m Heinz, and you are?” He held out a hand covered in a pristine white glove.

The agent hadn’t expected to start a conversation with one of his marks, and he still felt awkward meeting strangers. He set the untouched champagne down and pulled his phone from his pocket and typed, letting the computer-generated voice speak for him. “ _ **My name is Perry, nice to meet you.**_ ”

Then Heinz did the unexpected and started speaking to him in flawless American Sign Language. “ _A pleasure to meet you, Perry. What brings you here tonight?_ ”

Perry couldn’t help the smile that touched his lips and he relaxed slightly, glad he didn’t have to explain his accident or disability to this man. “ _My brother and sister-in-law donate to the charity and had an extra ticket._ ”

Heinz raised his hands to reply when he grabbed by the upper arm by his younger brother. “Heinz! It’s time for your demo.”

“Roger, no. That’s what the video is for.” The elder brother crossed his arms and glared.

“Nobody pays attention to those videos, Heinz. Now go up there and wow them.” The younger Doofenshmirtz adjusted his brother’s bowtie and shoved him towards the stage.

Perry watched the exchange, and slipped off to get a better view of what Heinz was about to do. Apparently, the band was aware of Roger’s scheme and handed Heinz an acoustic guitar. The man pulled off his gloves, revealing slim-fingered hands, a shade paler than his face. A brief tuning of the guitar quieted the ballroom.

Beautiful mariachi style guitar music filled the room and Perry couldn’t stop staring at Heinz’s hands. When the song finished, Heinz set the guitar down, removed his jacket, unbuttoned his sleeve, grabbed his upper arm and twisted…

“DEI presents the future of prosthetics.” Heinz held his entire arm up for all to see, the craftsmanship was impeccable. Aside from the elbow joint and a strangeness about the hands, it looked real.

He held the arm aloft for all of sixty seconds before storming off the stage and into the crowd. Perry spent the rest of the evening watching Roger brag and hint at an upcoming mayoral campaign.

Later that evening, once he helped Lawrence and Linda (both a bit more than tipsy) to their room, he sat at his desk and started on his report for Major Monogram. He didn’t have much information, but he just couldn’t get Heinz out of his head. What kind of man was he? What kind of business is he wrapped up in? And where did he go after the performance?

Those questions plagued him until he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thus ends the parts of the story that I have on my hard drive. Updates will be sporadic, but I'm never quite done with stories until I mark them complete.


	3. Working Relationship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Perry attempts a surveillance mission on his target and ends up with more than he bargained for.

Perry carefully climbed the sheer face of the DEI building, sticking to the shadows caused by the “blackout” that had been carefully staged to cover his current mission. This side of the building was almost in complete darkness on the moonless night and his black gear made him impossible to spot.

Once he reached the odd observation deck, he coiled up the line from his grappling hook and hooked it to his pack. He crept towards the darkened windows slowly. Intel stated that there weren’t any alarms this high up, as the deck was directly connected to Heinz Doofenshmirtz’s penthouse. He peered through the glass, looking in on the empty workshop. Perry pulled a small camera out of his pocket and stuck it to the side of one of the windows, facing inward. He moved to the other side of the deck to stick a second camera, hoping to capture the rest of the workshop.

He was almost finished when a bank of lights turns on, forcing the agent to slip into the shadows behind a potted tree and the wall. A motion sensor picked up the movements of Dr. Doofenshmirtz as he padded silently into the lab. Perry’s breath hitched as he caught sight of the scientist, dressed in a loose pair of pajama pants and nothing else. 

The file on Heinz was sparse at best, the recordkeeping in Drusselstein is downright archaic, half the population don’t even have birth certificates. All that was known about his childhood was that he lost his right arm as a child due to an animal attack and illegally entered the United States as a teenager. The almost-footnote in the man’s file did nothing to compare the sight of the man’s shoulder and the remnant of his arm, a patchwork of raking scars that wrapped around his shoulder and all across his back. Perry couldn’t help but wonder what life was like without hands. How did he function without the highly advanced limbs that mimicked flesh and bone so closely?

Heinz walked to one of his workbenches and hooked what looked like a drawer with his toes and pulled, revealing a sort of step stool up to the high-topped table. The scientist nimbly climbed onto the table and sat down, pulling a notebook closer with one foot. 

Perry marveled at the way the older man gripped a pen between his toes and started writing, oblivious to the onlooker outside. After it was clear that he had not been seen, he slowly crept out of his hiding place and enacted his exit plan. The black parachute opened above the city and he steered into the darkened part of the city. As soon as his feet touched the ground, the city lights blinked on again in a sweeping cascade. He quickly gathered his chute and took a circuitous route back to his headquarters deep beneath his brother’s house.

Once in at his desk, he pulled up the video feed from the cameras but found that they weren’t capturing video. Frowning, he placed a call to Carl, his handler and technical support. “ _Hi Carl, the video from those new cameras isn’t working, can you run a diagnostic?_ ”

“Sure thing, Agent P.” The redhead sat down at one of the terminals and started typing. “That’s weird. They’re functioning, but it’s like you put them against a wall or something. Was there a coating on the windows you planted them on?”

He thought back and nodded. “ _Looked like window tint._ ”

“I was afraid of this. One of Doofenshmirtz’s patents is a coating for glass that blocks video surveillance. I didn’t expect he’d use it because it’s very expensive to make.” Carl looked apologetic. “We’re going to have to resort to surveillance the old-fashioned way.”

Early the next morning, Perry sat in Roger Doofenshmirtz’s office at DEI accompanied by Karen, a blonde agent acting as his translator. 

“Alright so, the job is simple enough, you’ll be Heinz’s assistant and do whatever he asks.” Roger stated, shuffling the resume and other documents Carl put together for his cover assignment. A false job history covered Perry’s time in the military and claimed he had a degree in some obscure branch of communications that made him useless for every other job in the company except as Dr. Doofenshmirtz’s assistant.

“ _Yes sir, I can do that._ ” He signed and Karen translated.

Roger looked at Karen with a stern gaze and then turned to Perry, “Heinz is fluent in sign language, so your translator’s services won’t be needed.”

Karen bristled, but held her tongue, not wanting to blow the whole operation because Roger was a dick. It wasn’t long after that Karen left to report back to Monogram that Perry got the job.

Perry filled out all the paperwork, finding it odd that he’d been given the job without actually talking to Dr. Doofenshmirtz. Three hours since he’d arrived for his interview, he and Roger ascended to the penthouse of the DEI building, a special badge being needed to access the restricted floors. 

Roger was out the elevator before the doors fully opened and Perry had to hurry to catch up. The lab was even more impressive in the daylight, the high ceilings were lit with bright lights, the shelves and drawers neatly organized. The large worktable was the only thing cluttered. Heinz stood, hunched over the table, hands tucked in the pockets of his lab coat.

“Heinz, I brought your new assistant to meet you.” Roger announced as if he were speaking to a child.

The scientist snapped up and spat out a long string of German so fast that Perry had a difficult time translating in his head. Roger took the verbal abuse as if he hadn’t heard it at all. “Now, you know you need an assistant, someone to remind you to get to important meetings and when it’s time to pick up Vanessa from school. His name is Henry Fletcher and he reports directly to me. Don’t think you can bully his supervisor into reassigning him someplace else.”

“Fine, fine. We’ll try this out for a week.” Dr. Doofenshmirtz sighed and made a shooing motion to Roger, apparently not wanting the man in his presence any longer.

Once they were alone, Heinz finally turned towards him. “I remember you from the party. I thought it was Perry?”

“ _Perry is a nickname for Henry._ ” He shrugged a little, unsure of how that worked but that’s how it’s always been ever since he was a child.

“Ah like Abby is short for Mabel even though they both have the same number of syllables.” The scientist nodded to himself, satisfied with that particular piece of trivia. “Let me guess, you aren’t any kind of scientist, are you?”

In actuality, Perry had a degree in computer science, it was just that he wasn’t allowed to share his experience with the military. Most of his missions had been classified. “ _I’m good with computers._ ”

“At least that’s something. Well I suppose you should just… clear off a space somewhere. I’m sure Roger can get you a laptop. Actually,” Heinz stepped over to a set of shelves and pulled a brand new, top of the line DEI laptop off the shelf and handed it out to him. “Don’t install anything HR, IT or Roger gives you. You’ll leave this here every night. This laptop doesn’t leave the building.” 

Perry nodded, excited to play with the new toy and curious why the warning about installing software. Maybe Heinz was afraid of corporate espionage. He opened the package and set up his laptop, setting it so that it would download updates and connect to the guest wifi.

“PERRY!” Heinz shouted, startling the man into action as he ran across the lab. The agent grabbed the fire extinguisher off the wall and sprayed his new boss, who’d somehow caught his lab coat on fire. “Oh, thank you Perry the assistant, you got here fast. You know this reminds me of a time in Gimmelshtump when half the village caught on fire. You see, there aren’t too many regulations on building material there and thatch is still the number one roofing material. The building went up so fast!” The man shook his head, likely lost in the memory. “But it was good afterwards, nobody died and there was lots of construction work for those that needed jobs.”

“ _Did you work on the reconstruction?_ ” Perry asked, curious to a glimpse into the life of the older man. 

“Oh, yes, yes I did. I was around thirteen at the time, and I’d just finished rebuilding my arm, not that that mattered, you see, I was paid to fetch and carry buckets of nails and pitch and any other sort of materials from one site to another. Usually that’s how one got into construction in Drusselstein. I didn’t stay there long, since I got a job repairing belts in the Doonkleberry processing plant shortly after that.” The man shook himself and smiled, then shed his burnt clothing, tossing it on the cluttered table. 

After the first day, Perry’s time at DEI fell into a routine. Dr. D. would explain whatever he was working on, then blow something up or catch fire or any number of weird disasters due to some kind of odd clumsiness. Then after Perry rescued him from whatever accident he caused, he’d start telling some strange and unbelievable story about his childhood. If the stories were to be believed, Heinz had such a traumatic past it’s a wonder he can tell the stories without sobbing. 

Usually there was lunch after the day’s backstory, and then more work until it was time to pick Vanessa up from school. Perry’s day was finished as soon as Heinz left for the elementary school, so he took to heading to his lair and taking notes on all that he’d learned. Slowly he pieced together the life of the mysterious inventor. 

Though the more he learned, the more questions he had. Both about Heinz and about why he was sent to spy on him.


	4. Sibling Rivalry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roger marvels at how he got where he is, thinking about the past before taking the first step towards his future.

Roger stood at the windows of his corner office, staring at the town that would be his by the end of the year. In a few short days, he was officially announcing his campaign for mayor of Danville. Everything was going along so perfectly, he felt silly for having to distract Heinz with the assistant. This one was on the verge of breaking the record for ‘longest assistant’, since Heinz usually found a flaw in the poor soul and had them transferred elsewhere in the company. 

Curious, Roger sat down at his desk and pulled up the camera footage from Heinz’s lab. He saw the mute assistant sitting at the corner of the workbench, typing away on a brand-new DEI laptop. Heinz, meanwhile was talking, flailing his arms around in one of his ridiculous stories. Probably the one about being forced to be the family lawn gnome. 

He honestly couldn’t come to terms with Heinz’s fantastical retelling of their childhood. Their parents had been stern, yes, but Heinz had been a rebellious child, always running away. And because of this, their father’s punishments were severe; but the rules were there for Heinz’s protection. Especially after he’d been maimed and lost his arm to that carnival’s supposedly tamed Goozim after running away to that horrible circus.

Heinz wouldn’t be where he is today without the discipline that Father instilled in him. The only thing his brother lacked now was focus, which was why Roger stepped in to help him with the business once they’d reunited at Father’s deathbed. Roger stood up again and moved over to the corner of his office where he kept the small bar and poured himself a finger of whiskey, downing the burning liquid with one go. 

Eleven years. Eleven years ago, Roger had been in college studying business in Drusselstein, planning to take a year abroad in either London or Paris when Father took ill; his cancer had spread too far and fast to be treated effectively. With little time left, Roger tracked Heinz down breaking the news to him. 

_“Heinz? This is Roger, please don’t hang up.” Roger pleaded, tired from the many, many phone calls he had to make to track down his prodigal brother._

_The silence on the other end of the phone seemed to stretch on for hours. “… What do you want, Roger?” Heinz asked, his Drusselsteinian accent still strong despite living in the United States for almost a decade._

_“I just wanted you to know that our father is dying. If you wish to see him, you should come soon.” He said as evenly as he could manage, his own grief thick in his throat._

_“How long does he have?” Came Heinz’s eventual reply, his tone even and clinical._

_“A month at most.” Roger was glad that he’d been on summer break from university so that he could help Mother with the nurses, hospital and all the arrangements. Organization came natural to the young man and he just had a knack of getting people to listen to him. Well, all but one person, that is._

_“I see. Thank you for calling.” The phone disconnected so abruptly that Roger thought maybe he imagined the tone in his ear._

_With nothing else to do, Roger descended the stairs in his childhood home and helped his mother with the dishes._

_“Did you find him?” She asked quietly, her eyes focused on the dishtowel in hand. She seemed to be gripping it for dear life as if she was afraid of what came next._

_“I did. I don’t think he come.” He replied honestly to the question she really asked. He knew she felt guilty that Heinz jumped on a ship at sixteen years old and emigrated to America._

_She nodded once. “Thank you for trying, my dear Roger.” She patted his arm and hung the damp towel over the side of the sink._

_Two days later, Roger opened the door, expecting yet another neighbor with early condolences, asking if they needed anything. To his surprise, Heinz stood there, a duffle bag slung across his back and an awkwardly wrapped package cradled in his left arm._

_“Heinz!” Roger exclaimed, stunned and thrilled to see his older brother for the first time in years. His brother was taller, but still thin as a rail, taking after Father in ways that seemed eerie now that Heinz was grown._

_“Is he here or…?” The question seemed uncertain as Heinz brushed past Roger and removed his right hand from his pocket. He wore a glove on his artificial hand, but it moved much like his real one as he set the package down and unslung his bag. Roger was momentarily transfixed, remembering the awkward hook Heinz wore as a teenager._

_“Oh… yes. The nurse is with him now. Mother is out right now.” Roger followed Heinz dumbly, watching the near-stranger scrutinize every inch of the home._

_“What the hell is this?” Heinz eyed the gnome-shaped espresso machine in the kitchen next to the old-style stove._

_“Ahh, it was a gift to Father. He… missed his old gnome.” Roger supplied. “Makes pretty good espresso, would you like some?”_

_“No.” Heinz brushed his real fingers along the antique kitchen table and pressed his lips together at the four chairs, one chair in particular that had seen much less use than the others._

_“Heinz?_ Mein Gott _!” Mother rushed past Roger faster than he’d seen her move in years. “Oh Heinz!” She stopped just short of embracing her eldest son, her face twisted with uncertain emotions._

_His brother’s face softened slightly and he bent down and hugged her, whispering something too low for Roger to catch. Roger felt like he should give them space, but he couldn’t recall the last time he’d seen Mother hug Heinz. Surely, she must have._

_“Look at you! My Little Heinz is so tall. And you look so nice in that suit.” She wiped a tear away from her eye and stepped back to examine her son fully. She brushed some lint from Heinz’s jacket, then looked at his right hand. “I see you are able to afford better medical care in America.”_

_Heinz nodded once and removed the glove, showing the pale plastic hand to her, the fingers moved with slight clicking sounds but the movement was eerily smooth. “I’ve been designing prosthetics for a medical company. This is my latest prototype.” He flexed the fingers from a fist to a scissors and then paper motion._

_“It is very impressive Heinz.” Mother smiled proudly a him and relinquished her hold on his sleeve._

_“Mr. Doofenshmirtz is awake and demanding to know what all the noise is about,” Ola, Father’s nurse stepped into the kitchen, her hands on her hips as she leveled the three of them with a stern frown._

_Heinz stuffed his right hand in his pocket and scooped up the odd package he arrived with. “I will see him now.”_

_Roger never did find out what they spoke about for a full two hours. But when Heinz returned, he excused himself to take a walk around the neighborhood. Roger entered his Father’s sickroom to see the man fondly looking at an old gnome that now stood on the bedside table._

_“What’s this?” Roger asked, eyeing the odd decoration. Is this what Heinz brought?_

_“My beloved gnome taken from me when you were a baby.” The old man didn’t smile, but his face seemed to soften around the jawline. “Heinz found it and bought it back.”_

_It was the first time Roger heard Father mention his brother by name since he ran away. “Oh? That was thoughtful. What… what else did you talk about?”_

_“Nothing concerning you, Roger.” The old man made a dismissive gesture with a hand weighed down with IV tubes. “Have you decided where you are going to study?”  
Roger shook his head. “No, Father. London and Paris are both good candidates.” He repeated the same answer he’d given his father since he first arrived home for summer break. He honestly hadn’t decided and thinking about anything other than his immediate family issues was difficult. _

_“I am sure you will do well wherever you go, my son. Look at Heinz, he started out with less and will soon have a master’s degree in engineering. Already has a job with an important company.” The old man closed his eyes, drifting off to sleep._

_Roger watched him, unsure how he felt that Heinz and Father seemed to make up. Mother seemed enthralled with Heinz now as well. Maybe they’d decide to change their will to include him? No, they wouldn’t, he abandoned them all when he ran away. They were just happy that he showed his face. He’d eventually do something reckless and idiotic and then they’d remember that Roger was there all along._

“Roger, your campaign manager is on line three for you,” came Melanie’s voice over the phone’s speaker. 

He sighed and shook himself out of his memories. Nothing could ruin his plans now, not even Heinz.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, This took a turn I didn't expect. Hope you guys are still with me on this. I have a sort of fuzzy timeline here, and obviously things are different than cannon. Like Evil Science is not something you can have a degree in. Without that little detail, the universe changes so much. Corporations and Government replace villains and secret spies with jetpacks.
> 
> Reality is so much darker, isn't it?
> 
> Thank you all for the kudos and reviews. I couldn't do this without you.


	5. Wrong Side of the Bed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heinz should have stayed in bed. Luckily, Perry comes along to save the day.

_”Heinz we must hurry, the Goozim is loose!”_

_“Run Vanesa! Run for the truck!”_

_“It is too far away, Heinz, we’ll never make it!”_

_His breath pounding in his hears. Vanesa’s muttered prayers in her native language. The distant roar of the raging Goozim. The earth shook underneath the children as the beast gained on them._

_His whole body jerked to a horrible stop, his arm pulled out of socket as Vanesa was yanked away from him, crunched in the beast’s jaws. Her screams still rang in his ear when he hit the ground a few seconds later._

Heinz jerked awake, his heart pounding and a screaming pain searing from his right palm all the way to his shoulder. He groaned and rolled out of bed and wobbled to his feet. He rested his head against the wall for a moment and took several deep breaths, mentally preparing himself to start his day.

He hadn’t thought of little Vanesa Kovac, the Romany girl that told fortunes at the carnival he ran away with when he was eight years old. The clock read that he still had time to collect himself before he had to wake his daughter for school. If it hadn’t been for her, he would spend days like this in bed and let Roger and the other executives run the company until he felt like dealing with the world again. But Vanessa needed him, she didn’t have anyone else; Roger was the most un-parental person in the known universe and hell would have to freeze over if he’d let Vanessa spent unsupervised time alone with Mother.

The room seemed much bigger than it actually was by the time he shuffled over to the charging station that held his arms. He stepped on the pedal that raised the table up to shoulder-height. He slipped the stump of his left arm into the waiting prosthetic and closed his eyes while the start-up diagnostic, humming along with the chiptune that he’d programmed into the arm upon a successful startup procedure. 

Half-armed would have to do today, since Heinz couldn’t bring himself to attempt the other side. Luckily, or unluckily, he had many years practice of life without his right arm. Once he was dressed in a fresh t-shirt and a pair of workout pants, he entered Vanessa’s room. “Good morning!” He sing-songed with a smile, plopping all his weight down on the edge of her bed.

“Daaaaaaaaaaad!” She groaned and pulled her blanket over her head. “Can I stay home today?”

“No, sweetheart, you have to go to school, don’t you want to see Lacey today?” He gently grasped the blanket in his mechanical fingers and tugged it away from Vanessa’s head, mussing her long dark hair.

“No! We’re not friends anymore. She said that purple wasn’t the best color anymore.” The little girl pouted and pushed her tangled hair from her face. “You’re lop-sided today.” She nodded towards his empty sleeve.

“Yeah, I was a little lazy this morning, but that doesn’t mean you get to stay home today. Don’t you have that presentation on Drusselstein today?” He watched as she grabbed her hairbrush and slowly worked the knots out of her hair. For a brief moment in the light from the overcast sky streaming through the window, her hair looked black, her complexion darker and she looked eerily similar to the girl he failed to save from the Goozim. He hasn’t noticed Vanessa talking until she was well into her story.

“I might not get called to go today, Miss Patel is pulling names from a hat to pick the order. It’s supposed to keep people from waiting till the last minute.” She set the brush down when she was done with her hair. “But I have all those pictures from when we visited Great-Great-Aunt Henrietta’s castle last year and all the stuff we brought back. So I don’t really have to do anything.”

Heinz wondered if that was a bit like cheating on her geography report, not that many other kids in Vanessa’s class had a relative that lived in an actual castle. But the teacher allowed it, so he supposed he shouldn’t worry too much. He’d bring it up during the next parent-teacher conference. “Alright, what do you want for breakfast? Toast or Pop Tarts?”

“Pop Tarts! S’mores please!” She beamed and jumped out of bed to pick out today’s outfit.

He smiled for real, glad that a simple sugary pastry made her so happy. Sure, it wasn’t the balanced breakfast he usually tried to feed her but his body still ached and some extra sugar in the morning wouldn’t hurt either of them.

They rode their private elevator down to the underground parking garage and Vanessa literally ran around him in circles. He got to his car when he realized he forgot the keys on the kitchen counter. He bit back several curses and looked down at Vanessa, but was startled by the honking of a car horn distracted him.

Perry, his wonderful, loyal assistant hurried towards them, a cup of coffee in hand, already held out. “Ahh! There you are Perry, I forgot my keys upstairs and if we don’t leave now, Vanessa will be late. Would you mind giving us a ride to school?”

The younger man smiled and waved them back to his car, heading to the trunk of his car to pull out a booster seat and buckle it in for Vanessa. 

“Vanessa, sweetie, this is my assistant at work, Perry.” Heinz stood by with the coffee cup in his hand, waiting for Perry to finish with the booster seat. Vanessa nodded and climbed into the back of the car and Perry got in the driver’s seat. “Um… Perry?” 

Heinz could do quite a few amazing things but he couldn’t hold a hot cup of coffee and open a car door one-handed.

He saw the apologetic look on his assistant’s face as the younger man leaned over the passenger seat to pop the door open. Once Heinz got in the car, Perry took the coffee from him so he could shut the door and buckle up.

Once Perry pulled out of the garage, Heinz finally sipped his coffee, grateful his assistant remembered how he liked it. He felt the pounding in his head lessen slightly as they got nearer to the school. “Oh it just left up here.”

“ _I know, my niece goes to the same school._ ” Perry signed quickly, keeping his hands on the wheel as much as possible.

“Oh? How old is she? What’s her name?” He asked curiously.

Perry huffed exasperatedly. Oh. Right. “Sorry, your hands are kind off full.”

Vanessa got out and ran to the school. “Bye Dad!”

“ _My niece’s name is Candace and she’s eight. I also have two nephews, Phineas who is three and Ferb is four._ ” Perry signed while they waited to pull out of the school’s parking lot.

“Thanks for the ride, I don’t normally expect you to be my chauffeur. You can head home as soon as you drop me off, I’m not going to be working today, Perry.” Heinz slumped in the passenger seat for the remainder of the ride.

Perry snapped his fingers and Heinz looked over. “Sorry, what?”

They were in the DEI parking garage and Perry signed again. “ _You look terrible, are you okay?_ ”

“I’m… it’s nothing really. Just a bad nightmare and my arm is acting up again and I’ll probably just sit on the couch and watch soaps until it’s time to go get Vanessa later. She’ll be thrilled to get pizza for dinner tonight.”

The younger man was still a moment and raised his hands again. “ _Do you want company?_ ”

He thought about it and nodded. “You know what? Sure. I’m sure it’ll just infuriate Roger as well.” He grinned and let Perry swipe his key up to the private elevator to the penthouse above the workshop. “Make yourself at home.” He sat down on the couch, curiously watching his assistant look around.

Eventually, Perry sat on the other end of the couch. “ _What are we watching?_ ”

“El Matador de Amor. It’s in Spanish, but you’ll catch on quick.” Heinz explained, turning slightly so he could see both the TV and if his assistant wanted to ask questions.

Perhaps having company today would be better than crawling back into bed. “Hey, did I ever tell you about how I came to America?”

At the shake of Perry’s head, Heinz smiled. Somehow, he just found it so easy to talk to Perry. Something about the man made him feel like he could trust him.

“Well I was sixteen at the time…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before you ask, yes, my head cannon here is that Heinz named his daughter after the girl he knew as a child.


	6. Goofing Off

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Perry and Heinz hang out after Heinz's rough morning.

“ _Wait, wait, that doesn’t make any sense._ ” Perry signed, biting his lip to stifle his own laughter. “How did you get into college after you entered the country illegally?”

Heinz threw his head back and cackled. “Fine, fine, so I was homeless, and I didn’t have anywhere to go and I didn’t speak English that well but I ended up pretending to be a student at the Columbus College of Engineering and sat in on as many classes and lectures as I could get away with. One of the professors, Dr.Gevaarlijk who was from Drusselstein as well, realized I wasn’t actually enrolled there and was about to kick me out. But she saw some of the schematics I’d been drawing and thought they were brilliant, so she helped me get a student visa and a scholarship. I sold bratwursts on the street for money for food and other necessities. Then when I graduated, I was contacted by one of Gevaarlijk’s associates for an internship and went to grad school. After the internship was over, I worked for Grubek Medical, a small company that built prosthetics and that’s where I prototyped a lot of the pieces for my latest line of arms.”

“ _Are you a citizen now?_ ” Perry asked, rather amazed at the truth. Heinz wasn’t very good at lying, he tended to always say what was on his mind instead.

“Oh yes. I’ve had my green card for years now. What about you?”

Perry blinked, surprised that Heinz figured out that he wasn’t American. “ _How did you know?_ ”

Heinz laughed again and stood, heading for the open kitchen off the side of the living room. “The other day you mentioned taking tea instead of dinner or supper. How long have you been living here?”

“ _I figured you just looked over the file where HR has my work visa. But yeah I guess the tea gave me away._ ” Perry felt a bit odd that Heinz had noticed his customs. He was supposed to be rather invisible, observe and nothing more, but here he was spending the day with his mark, hanging out and eating sandwiches and almond brittle. “ _It’s been a little over a year. I came to be closer to my brother and his family._ ” Perry said simply. It was close enough to the truth to not feel like lying.

He watched Heinz nod and head into the bathroom, taking the moment alone to snoop around a little more. He saw various pictures of Vanessa and Heinz, one of Vanessa and who he assumed was Heinz’s mother but nothing of Vanessa’s mother. He grabbed his empty water glass and went to the fridge, glancing over at the straight A report card hung with pride. 

Perry once again questioned his mission, all Heinz seemed to want was to create things and raise his daughter in peace. He wasn’t involved in any sales or purchases of DEI; his only pet project was the miraculous arms that were revealed during the charity event. Sometimes Perry heard him speaking on the phone to someone named Norm, but that didn’t seem like more than a side project, something he spoke to this other person about when he was bored. 

Heinz was a complicated man. Perry was sure that he’s heard more about the man’s life than anyone else, Perry has that sort of face where people always feel the need to tell him things. Though Heinz seemed to take it much further. Or maybe he’s just been keeping it all in. Either way, a lesser man would have given up long ago. But if he questioned his orders to Major Monogram, he might be reassigned and Heinz would just have someone else watching him. Someone that might not be above planting bugs in his house, or Vanessa’s room.

“There you are, Perry, sorry for leaving you alone, but I had to take some ibuprofen for my shoulder.” He apologized and Perry noticed he’d put on a thick pullover hoodie, both sleeves hanging empty. 

It wasn’t public knowledge that Heinz was a double amputee. Of course, he already knew because he read Heinz’s files which reported an accident a decade ago and Heinz dropping off the map for two years before starting DEI with his brother. And he’d seen him through the window almost two months ago when he’d tried to plant cameras outside the lab. Still, it was a bit jarring.

“ _Are you okay?_ ” Perry asked, feeling that something had been off about his boss all day. 

“A little. Phantom pain. And the muscles and nerves left in my right shoulder aren’t the best, so the sensors in the prosthetic are twitchy on a good day.” The older man shrugged and glanced around again, the tip of a story on his tongue. “And being lop-sided, as Vanessa calls it, makes my shoulder ache. They’re still too heavy to feel normal.” 

Heinz’s permanent slouch seemed to make more sense, though now that he wasn’t weighed down with titanium arms, he stood a good six inches taller than Perry. The secret agent was a bit in awe of the trust Heinz placed in him, once again making his stomach clench in uncertainty when he thought of the possible things Monogram wanted with the eccentric scientist.

The penthouse door slammed open so hard it bounced off the doorstop. “Heinz!” Roger bellowed, a fistful of papers clenched in his hand so hard his knuckles were white. “What the hell do you think you’re doing? I’ve been calling you all day! You can’t just choose to blow off the board of directors whenever you feel like it?”

Heinz tipped his head back, stretching his neck as his brother stormed through the living room to where the pair stood. Roger looked from Heinz to Perry and back to his brother. “We have deadlines to hit, Heinz. The AI deadline is slipping and you haven’t made any progress in weeks. And what are you doing? Watching telenovelas with him?”

Perry’s eyebrows rose, unsure of the project Roger was so upset over. The two months he’d been shadowing Heinz, this was the first mention of it. Unless it was something Heinz worked on when Perry wasn’t around. This was something he’d have to look into.

“Roger,” Heinz said tiredly, his voice slipping more and more into his accent. “One day off won’t kill the project.” He bent backwards, ignoring Roger’s stern look and clenched jaw.

“We’ve got investors, Heinz. The board is unhappy. You need to take more responsibility!” Roger glared as Heinz fidgeted, clearly not taking this as seriously as Roger wished him to.

Perry wondered if he should step in, but Roger didn’t know sign language, and Heinz was blatantly ignoring his younger brother.

Roger suddenly thrust a finger at his brother, “ _Bewege dich nicht!_ ”

Heinz jerked ramrod straight, but his eyes burned into Roger’s with a hate that Perry didn’t think Heinz was capable of.

“You will turn up at the board meeting tomorrow at eight o’clock sharp and you’d better have something to show, or we’ll lose millions. Do you understand, Heinz? We’ll be done!” Roger threw the folder on the floor in front of his brother and stormed out, not even bothering to slam the door behind him.

Perry didn’t know what to do, Heinz was still frozen on the spot. Perry slowly bent down to pick up the contracts scattered over the floor. Heinz was building some sort of AI system? At least that seemed more significant to someone like Monogram. He quickly put the papers on the counter and stood, now worried. He snapped his fingers in front of Heinz’s face and the doctor let out a shuddering breath.

“I need you to get my phone.” Heinz all but whispered.

Perry found the discarded cell phone on the coffee table and brought it back to his boss.

“Contacts. Rosie.” He mumbled and Perry found a Rosie M. in the contacts list. He dialed the number, putting the phone on speaker.

“Hello?” A nice sounding woman answered the phone.

Heinz cleared his throat. “Hi Rosie, it’s Heinz. Something important came up at work and I’ll be busy all night, would you be able to pick Vanessa up at school?”

“Sure thing, sugar,” her soft Texan twang coming from the speaker. “You need her to stay overnight here?”

“Yeah, I’m afraid I’ll have to pull an all-nighter.” Heinz sighed. “My assistant will drop off Vanessa’s things.”

“Sounds good. I’ll text you later when I pick her up, alright?”

“Thanks Rosie, you’re the best.” Heinz nodded to Perry who hung up the phone. Heinz finally relaxed from his upright position. He slumped backawards against the fridge and sunk down to the floor. 

“I’d like to be alone now, Perry.” He said woodenly.

“ _Are you sure?_ ” He signed, but he was sure Heinz wasn’t looking. Reluctantly, he left, heading down to his car and headed home. He didn’t even write a report for the day, just lay down on his bed, wondering what project would be so important that Roger had to resort to bullying Heinz like that.

He sighed and stood up, changing into his climbing gear. He didn’t feel right about the situation. Perry decided to head back to DEI to make sure Heinz was okay.


	7. Demonstration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will Heinz come through with the demonstration Roger ordered?

Roger hated using Father’s words against Heinz, but if the AI project didn’t go well, he’d lose several under-the-table deals to his military contacts that promised future backing on his fledgling political career. He retreated to his office and sat down, turning on the video feed from the lab.

Heinz was already sitting on the workbench, his left arm on the table beside him and a laptop open in front of him. He wrote with a pen between his toes and hunched over, his lips moving in a constant monologue that no one else could hear. Heinz was fine, he just needed a bit of a push to get re-focused. He could have a tantrum about it after the meeting in the morning.

He ended up falling asleep at his desk, waking up an hour before the meeting to change into his spare suit and combing his hair in the mirror above his office bar. A check to the video feed in the lab showed Heinz literally armed and pacing about, shouting at something or other. He seemed fine, Heinz flailing around was normal behavior. See? Everything was going to go well today.

Roger was the first in the conference room, obsessively arranging a bagel platter and a set of DEI mugs on the side table. He hummed that stupid jingle Heinz was always trying to pitch. “Doof-en-shmirts Engin-eering In-corp-orated.”

“Mister Doofenshmirtz,” a gruff voice said from behind him.

Roger turned and smiled at his first guest. “Good morning, Major Monogram. Glad you could make it today.”

“Yes well, this Artificial Intelligence, if it works as well as you claim it does, it should revolutionize many military projects just as well as those rocket skiffs you came out with several years ago.” 

Roger nodded, “I’m sure you’ll be pleased with my brother’s demonstration today, Major.”

He hoped so, at least. Heinz was a natural pitch man. And if he wanted something bad enough, he just somehow made it happen. Just like coming to this country, instead of getting arrested and deported, he got a free education and an internship that set his career on fire.

The rest of the board members filed in, taking coffee and bagels, talking amongst themselves. Besides Monogram and the board of directors, around the conference table there was Admiral Ingram from the Navy and Hiro Tanaka, a representative of a company working on “adult companion dolls”. On the phone were other various representatives from companies interested in their research. Now the only person missing was Heinz.

The conference room doors opened dramatically, but only Fletcher, Heinz’s assistant stepped through, shrugging his shoulders idiotically as if he had no idea where his boss could be.

Five minutes past eight, the doors opened again, Heinz this time, backing up through the door and dragging a man in a wheelchair with him. No, it wasn’t a man, it was… a mannequin? What nonsense was it this time? Roger looked back to Heinz noting the dark circles under his eyes and pale complexion. He must not have slept at all. Heinz awkwardly maneuvered the wheelchair around and then put his hand on the dummy’s shoulder.

“Ladies and gentlemen of the board and whoever the rest of you are,” Heinz announced, “this fine young man is about to have a birthday.” He grinned and pressed something on the back of the mannequin’s neck.

Oddly enough, the lifeless thing played Heinz’s annoying jingle and the odd face seemed to take on a more human appearance. The skin of the face seemed to soften and the dummy started to look around the room blinking. “Norm, why don’t you say hello?”

The robot turned and focused on Heinz. “Primary User: Heinz Doofenshmirtz, confirmed.” The thing turned to the others and looked around. “Auxiliary users identified and registered.” Norm paused and stood in an eerie motion. “Hi, I’m Norm!” The too-big grin and stiff wave caused those at the table to look at each other questioningly.

“Norm,” Heinz stated, “how about the traffic report?”

“Traffic is heavier due to an accident down by the courthouse and construction on I-20, but it is moving steadily. You should add at least ten extra minutes to your commute home.” 

Roger frowned, that was nothing more than his cell phone could do. What was Heinz doing all night? 

“That’s great buddy, how about that health report? For Mr. Tanaka here?” Heinz ordered the robot.

Norm walked with the fluidity that Roger saw in Heinz’s arms and knew the body had likely been finished for months now. The android held out its hand to Mr. Tanaka, who shook it briefly. “This is amazing, his hand feels so real.” 

“Mmhmm, he’s made of the same material as the new line of prosthetics.” Heinz filled in before Norm let go of the executive’s hand.

“Mr. Tanaka’s temperature and pulse are at normal levels, though his blood pressure is a bit high. I force-paired with his smart watch and phone. Mr. Tanaka needs to lay off the cheese burgers and get more exercise.” Norm said in that same conversational American tone.

Mr. Tanaka’s mouth opened wide and he checked his watch. “That’s amazing, it’s hacking but the possibilities of interfacing with other smart devices on its own? Incredible.”

“That’s great Norm, what else can you do?” Heinz leaned against the abandoned chair and stifled a yawn.

“Well, I can lift up to three hundred pounds, I don’t need charged for 48 hours with average use, I’ve already sorted out five hundred sixty-three of Dr. Doofenshmirtz’s emails and updated his calendar to include several upcoming events from Vanessa’s school which he shouldn’t miss.” The android paced over to the coffee and gently grabbed a cup, then a carafe and poured a cup of coffee. “I’ve also interfaced with the Bluetooth in Mr. Doofenshmirtz’s phone and downloaded ten albums of classic Drusselstenian folk music because his personalized Spotify playlist doesn’t have any and Hilda Doofenshmirtz’s birthday is in three days. Your mother will be pleased to hear the music at the party you have planned.”

Roger looked at his phone and noticed all his playlists were updated with the most horrid folk music available on the Internet. He grinned so hard his teeth hurt as he showed the rest of the audience his phone about the good humored prank.

The room watched in rapt fascination as the android spread cream cheese on half a bagel and added sugar to the coffee, then brought both back to Heinz in the corner. “I noticed you hadn’t had any breakfast this morning, Doctor, you should eat.”

Heinz took the offered breakfast and nodded. “That’ll be all Norm, thank you.” Heinz sipped the coffee and tossed the bagel to Fletcher. The android sat back down in the wheelchair, even going so far as to put its feet on the rests before powering down. “Norm has been online and active for two weeks now, learning about me. Just imagine what he could do for any of you after a month of learning your schedules, interacting with your families and interfacing with the rest of your devices. Norm is a cost effective personal assistant that can be added to any office or even a home. He cooks, he cleans and answers phones. With a simple cellular chip, he can access the Internet or any available wifi network. He runs on one of DEI’s Squirrel solar batteries and can easily be stored in an alcove or closet for charging. He can be programmed in any language and has a dev kit, if your companies want to create your own Norm software. Every Norm will be custom built to spec, so there won’t be an in-store display. He’s a specialty product, and will be priced accordingly. Of course a deal can be made if all you need is the software brain.”

Heinz finished his coffee and looked around the room. “Any questions?”

Roger tuned out the technical details that were being discussed as he processed the demonstration. The android part was new, the order had just been for the AI, but if they could sell the physical hardware, then they could charge thousands more for every unit sold. 

Roger smiled, he knew Heinz would come through for him. He hung back, waiting until the board members and guests left. “Heinz, you were brilliant!”

He didn’t expect the full force of a titanium-alloyed left-hook smashing into his face. “You don’t tell me when I can move.”

Hours later, after a trip to the emergency room, Roger checked his voicemail.

“ _This is Monogram. The AI is a go. Just reign in your brother to design it to our specifications._ ”

Everything was falling into place. Now that the core AI was finished, he could give the project to someone more pliable. Heinz would never agree to the military contract, so now he needed to go. He thought about replacements as he deleted twelve gigabytes of folk music from his phone.


	8. Lull

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Perry finds that vacation can be boring

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick note, Ferb is 4 and Phineas is 3 in this story. So if you're wondering where all the cool stuff is, it's not been built yet. A three-year-old is a bit too young to hire subcontractors.

Perry was impressed by Heinz’s left hook, Roger’s face looked bad. Maybe even a fracture in his cheekbone. He probably deserved it, putting Heinz in such an awful state the day before. Heinz told him about his father making him stand in as a lawn gnome, but he’d played it down in the telling. He’d kept watch on Heinz all night, through the frantic programming and finish of the android now known as Norm. The thing kind of creeped him out a little, but it seemed harmless enough. 

For now, he followed Heinz back to the penthouse, unsure of what might happen next. Heinz seemed calm and collected now, but who knows what will happen once they’re alone again.

“That was excruciating. I’ve never felt so unprepared for a demonstration since college.” Heinz dropped down onto the couch, letting his limbs fall gravity took them. 

“ _Do you need me to get you anything?_ ” Perry asked.

“I’m going to set an alarm and sleep until it’s time to pick up Vanessa.” He shrugged off his labcoat and stood up. “Since I’m apparently not allowed to let you have a day off, I’d like you to book Vanessa and I a flight to Drusselstein for this weekend. Return trip isn’t important right now, school lets out at the end of the week anyway. Arrange a rental car, nothing fancy, a Yugo will do, at the airport. No hotel though, we’ll be staying at Hawkenschpit castle. It’s the one place in the world where Roger isn’t welcome.”

He blinked, that’s an odd thing to say. “ _Sure, I’ll email you the details. Get some rest._ ”

“Put in some vacation time yourself, Perry. No one to assist and all that. Whatever you like, I’ll approve.” Heinz waved him off and Perry rode the elevator back down to the lab to fetch his laptop and put Heinz’s trip together. 

With his busywork out of the way, he headed home.

“There you are, Perry,” Linda greeted him as he pulled up in the driveway. “You’re home early.”

He got out of his car and sighed. “ _Dr. Doofenshmirtz is taking a holiday and so I have one too._ ”

“Well that’s good. The kids will be thrilled to have you around for the first week of summer.” She smiled and went back to her gardening. Perry headed into the house and loosened his tie, heading down to the basement to his room. Once he was sure he was alone, he put a pair of headphones on and made the video call to his handler, Carl.

“Hey Agent P, I uh… I got some bad news for you,” the young man shifted uncomfortably. “Um… let me transfer you to Major Monogram.”

“Agent P, this AI project was out of nowhere. You didn’t report on it at all.” 

“ _I’m sorry Sir, Dr. Doofenshmirtz didn’t work on it while I was with him._ ” 

Monogram frowned, “I’m sorry Agent P, this just isn’t working out. I’m afraid we’re going to let you go. If you try to call this number again, it won’t exist. Your paycheck will be deposited in your account.”

The line went dead and Perry sighed, sitting down heavily on his bed. At least he still worked for Heinz. Maybe. Was his cover job still legit? He sighed again, wondering what he was going to do with himself while Heinz and Vanessa were out of the country.

The days passed by slowly, he spent most of them in the back yard with the kids, but their projects and games only lasted so long. Three weeks after Monogram let him go, he received two sets of termination papers… one from O.W.C.A. and one from DEI. Great. Reluctantly, he signed all the proper documents and started looking for another job.

“What’s wrong?” Lawrence asked him while Perry was looking at a job website at the kitchen table.

Perry leaned back in the chair and stretched his legs out under the table. “ _Got fired from DEI. Not sure why. I thought they were happy with me._ ” He at least thought that once his assignment had ended, he’d be reassigned. Even a desk job would be better than nothing.

“Think of this as an opportunity to do whatever you like. I mean, it’s not like you need the money.” Lawrence reasoned and put the teapot on. 

Perry considered this, he didn’t need the money, between his salary from the military and the fact that Linda and Lawrence didn’t charge him rent, he would be fine financially for a while. But all he’d ever wanted to do was to help people, and be a spy. Plus, he really, really enjoyed the work. He’d looked into work at all the agencies he could get an interview or application with. But after his injury, nobody wanted him except O.W.C.A., at least for anything other than a desk job.

At least Heinz was entertaining. Working with him was fun, they talked about theory, movies, design. There had been paperwork and meetings, but it didn’t seem all that bad. Something usually caught fire or exploded or got out of control that needed tackling. He frowned wondering why he was so fixated on Heinz lately. Maybe it was because he hadn’t made any close friends since he moved to Danville.

“Mum mentioned that she’d like to see you, why don’t you head home for a week or so? Do some traveling, visit the rest of the family.” Lawrence suggested. 

Perry nodded, maybe a change of scenery would do him good?

“ _That’s a good idea. I’ll look for a flight._ ” He opened a new browser tab and booked a flight to England for tomorrow. He hovered over a flight for Drusselstein, but scoffed, what the hell would he do there? He’d go to England, then maybe Scotland. Clear his head a little bit and figure out what to do with the rest of his life now that he couldn’t be the actual James Bond.

He headed down to his room, pulling out his suitcase and started packing. His TV was turned on to the news as background noise. He turned at the soft knock on the doorframe and clicked his tongue at Ferb to enter. Ferb was an intelligent young man, but for some reason he just didn’t like to speak. The four year old took to sign language like a duck to water and the “silent duo” would often have long conversations where Ferb would ask questions and Perry would do his best to answer them.

“ _Are you leaving us, Uncle Perry?_ ” Ferb signed after climbing up on the edge of the bed.

“ _Just for a little while. I’m going back to England for a spell, but I’ll be back. I miss home._ ” And he did, if he really thought about it. Danville was a bit too sunny all the time and there was just something different here than back in London. Maybe he’d feel a bit more comfortable there now that he’d come to terms with losing his voice.

“ _Can I come too? I miss home too._ ” Ferb signed, flopping back on the bed, but keeping an eye on his uncle.

“ _Sorry, someone needs to keep an eye on Phineas and Candace for me. Can I trust you to keep them out of trouble?_ ” Perry signed, knowing Ferb liked his new siblings and was pretty level-headed for a four year old.

“Okay,” Ferb said aloud with a big sigh. “ _I’ll make sure Phineas doesn’t try to fly again without a helmet._ ”

Perry grinned and hugged his young nephew. Phineas had so many ideas but wasn’t too good at implementing them. Ferb was good at building things, but usually needed inspiration. Together these two will be unstoppable. 

“ _I think your mom is making doonkleberry pie, why don’t you see if it needs a taste?_ ” 

Ferb didn’t need any more prodding, he raced upstairs and Perry was alone once more.


	9. Downtime

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hiding in Drusselstein, Heinz tries to get over losing his company. But you have to go home sometime.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter! Thank you revenblue and Maria Klassen for your continued encouragement and comments. They really keep me going.

Heinz woke from a dreamless sleep and turned to find Vanessa curled up against his side, her arms snaked around his waist. For a fleeting moment, he wished he could squeeze her with his own arms, but the thought passed as he attempted to free himself from the ten-year-old’s death grip.

Once he was out of bed and “armed”, he dressed and headed to the kitchen to make some coffee. Great-Aunt Henrietta was already awake and sitting at the table, reading the local newspaper.

“Good morning, Aunt Henrietta.” Heinz greeted and poured himself a cup of coffee. 

“Good morning, Heinz. Do you have any plans for today?”

“Nothing really. Is there anything you need me to do for you?” He asked, he always liked Henrietta; she was the one relative that didn’t hate him. 

“No, Heinz, but you could tell me how long you are planning to mope about my castle,” the old woman gestured him closer.

He sat next to his favorite relative and she took his hands in hers. “Heinz, I know you are upset about your job. But you cannot hide here forever. Vanessa needs to go back to school soon.”

He sighed, nodding. He’d originally planned a two-week vacation, but it turned to two months when he’d been sent a packet of legal documents and termination papers. A day later, it was all over the international news, he’d been pushed out of his own company. He still had money and Vanessa, but what was he supposed to do now? The patent rights would be tied up in courts for years, so he wouldn’t be able to take his designs to other companies. He couldn’t start over, not unless he had another revolutionary idea. And those didn't exactly grow on trees.

“She fits in here better than I ever did.” He sighs, looking out the large kitchen window at the small but modern city that Schpitzburg had become over the past fifteen years. Now all the houses had cable and Internet and all the children had cell phones. Vanessa made friends easily, picking up more German and teaching English in return.

She was popular because she was different. But she was also a smart, charming and confidant girl with a small but loving family. He watched Vanessa drag her feet into the kitchen and look up at him with sleep-heavy lids.

“Dad can I have pancakes?”

“Sure, sweetie. Is there anything you want to do today?” He asked, heading for the cabinet for pancake ingredients.

“Can we go up to Mount Drussel and see the shaft?”

Heinz stilled, surprised at the suggestion. “I’m afraid you’re not old enough for that trail, sweetie.” He turned back to the cupboard and steadied his breathing. She couldn't know that that trail was where he'd lost his left arm while hiking with Roger.

“Vanessa, let’s go pick some fresh doonkleberries from the garden for your breakfast.” Henrietta stood and smiled at the child. Heinz was grateful for the moment alone to compose himself. He hadn’t told anyone what happened on that trip. Mostly because once he fell off the trail, he hit his head on the way down and blacked out. The memories were fuzzy until waking in the hospital after a surgeon removed his left arm just above his elbow. Roger also only ever gave him the vaguest of explanations. It was just one more reason to not trust a word that fell out of Roger’s mouth. 

By the time Vanessa skipped back inside, Heinz was calm once again, ready with the first batch of pancakes. “Dad, when are we going home?”

“Monday. Tomorrow we’ll go to church with Aunt Henrietta,” he could see Henrietta smile from her place at the door, “and then we’ll catch an evening flight back to Danville. Our new house is waiting for us.”

“New house?” Vanessa looked a little horrified. 

“It has a back yard, and two floors. And it’s only two streets away from your friend Lacey.”

“Really? A yard and Lacey? I could walk to her house? And she could come over?” The change in attitude was so fast it almost gave Heinz whiplash. 

“Yes. And there are other kids in the neighborhood too. And I’ll be home all the time for a while.” He plated up some breakfast for her and sat down with a fresh cup of coffee.

“Really?”

“Yes, really.” 

The next two days passed quickly, and by the time Heinz carried Vanessa into their new home it was nearly morning, though the jet lag always hit him hard. He’d had her room set up as close as he could get to what it was in the penthouse. Though this time, her bedroom had extra space enough for her own couch and a bookcase. Not wanting to have her wake up in the unfamiliar space, he dropped down on the couch and closed his eyes.

“Dad!”

Heinz jerked out of a dreamless sleep at the sound of the shout and immediately knew he would pay for cramming himself on the small couch all night. “ _Was is' ?_ ”

“This house is awesome! This is my room?” He could see her bouncing on her toes in excitement.

He nodded and found himself half-strangled by her hug. It took him a moment to untangle his arms and return the hug. “My room is just down the hallway. Bathroom is in the middle.”

“I wasn’t sure about it when you mentioned it but now that we’re here, this is the best!”

“I’m glad you like it, what time is it?” He stood up slowly and tried to work the kinks out of his neck and back.

“It’s almost noon!” She followed him down the stairs and leaned on the counter as he made a pot of coffee. He thought he’d have a bit more time to get some groceries delivered, but he slept too long.

Before he could plan a shopping trip, the doorbell rang. He opened the front door, forgetting that he was still in his clothes from yesterday, the monotone clothes from Drusselstein, though his suspenders were slung low on his hips. Oh well. He’d have to get used to having neighbors again.

“Hi, I’m Linda Flynn-Fletcher. We’re just across the street. I brought a casserole to welcome you to the neighborhood.” The red-haired woman smiled and something seemed awfully familiar about her.

“Hi, Heinz Doofenshmirtz… we used to date, didn’t we?” The awkward sentence fell out of his mouth before he could control it, causing him to cringe.

To his surprise, she laughed. “Oh my God! Heinz! I can’t believe it’s you.”

He stepped aside and noticed she was trailed by three children, a pair of red-heads and a green-haired child, “Come in, come in, let me take that.” He gently took the hot tray from Linda.

“Careful, it’s hot.” She warned, but she likely didn’t know his hands didn’t get burnt. There were feedback sensors, but it wasn’t like real skin burning or getting cut. He set the food in the kitchen and then put his hand on Vanessa’s shoulder, ushering her in to meet the neighbors.

“You have a lovely home, Heinz. Is this your daughter?” Linda bent down to Vanessa’s level. “Hi, I’m Linda Flynn-Fletcher. These are my kids, Candace, Phineas and Ferb.” She said, introducing her trio of children.

“I’m Vanessa. It’s nice to meet you,” Vanessa answered, immediately switching back to English despite the fact that she had put on the dress Henrietta had bought her on their last shopping trip. She turned to the other children and smiled. “Want to see my room?”

Soon there was a stampede up the stairs and Heinz and Linda both laughed. “They might not come out for hours now.” Linda shook her head with a smile.

“We were just in Drusselstein and brought back some pastries. Would you like one? I’ve got a pot of coffee just made,” Heinz offered.

“Sure. You can tell me what how you got to famous inventor from being the guy that taught me how to sneak into movies and get free food from restaurants.”

“But only if you tell me what it was like being a pop star.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Where Gimmelshtump is a small, rather isolated town, I figure Schpitzburg might be a bigger city that's more modern. Gimmelshtump is where Doofenshmirtz castle used to be. I'm setting Schpitzburg as where Hawkenschpit castle is located.
> 
> Mount Drussel, the highest point in Drusselstein. I imagine the Shaft runs right through the mountain and it is quite the tourist attraction.


	10. Return

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Perry returns from his own vacation to find the one person he ran away from

Perry stretched as he stood from the seat on the plane and waited patiently to exit the plane. His backpack already on his shoulders, he helped the woman next to him get her bag down before heading to baggage claim.

He grinned and waved when he saw his oldest brother Lawrence holding up a sign with a picture of a platypus on it. As a child, his brothers used to call him “Perry the platypus” because he was an “odd duck”, always rushing into things and being an odd sort of adrenaline junkie. He didn’t play football (or soccer to the Americans), instead he went out for rugby because there was more action involved. He joined the Royal Air Force right after college and flew all sorts of different aircraft before joining the SAS and becoming a paratrooper and joining an anti-terrorist unit. He’d planned to stay in the military for his entire career but one errant bullet to the neck cut that dream short. 

Lawrence greeted him with a hug and they walked together to get his luggage. “How was your trip? I saw some of your pictures online.”

Perry shrugged, now that he was sure his undercover career was over, he’d posted several pictures to social media of his trip. More specifically video from when he went sky diving with some guys from his old unit, and the ski trip he took to Switzerland with their cousins. “ _Yeah, it was a lot of fun. I needed it._ ”

“Adrian and Lucy said you’d gone on a couple of dates, is that true?” Lawrence grabbed Perry’s bag so he could explain.

Relationships had always been a bit hard for Perry. Like everything else, he usually rushed into them headfirst and ended up crashing and burning. And he’d realized fairly early on that he was gay, which made things a bit awkward among certain crowds. Though his family always accepted him, he was always a bit terrible at picking up guys. Especially now that there was a language barrier. But Adrian had known a couple open-minded guys to set him up with, and he did have fun, but neither of them were his type. “ _Yes. Shut up. Just a couple of dates. Nothing serious._ ” 

“Which is fine. You just gotta put yourself out there!” Lawrence beamed and clapped his youngest brother on the back.

The ride home was quiet, Perry closed his eyes and napped while Lawrence got them through the morning rush hour traffic. He smiled when he saw the familiar house. He jumped out of the car and grabbed his bag, whistling loud enough for the kids to hear him in the back yard. Linda came out and gathered Perry into a hug. “The kids aren’t home, right now. They’re down the street with Heinz.”

Heinz? His former boss Heinz? His former mark Heinz? He must have had the oddest look on his face because Linda just laughed.

“Heinz Doofenshmirtz move into the Millers’ old house. The kids love him and that robot of his. Why don’t you go over and say ‘hi’?” She gave him a weird nudge in the ribs. Was she hinting? It was kind of embarrassing.

“ _You want me to go over and say ‘hi’ to the guy that fired me through the mail?_ ” He asked, backing up a step so she’d stop elbowing him in the ribs.

“He didn’t fire you, the board of directors let go all of his staff when they voted him out. He told me to tell you that he’s sorry about that, by the way.” She turned to lean on the doorframe, blocking him from entering the house.

He wasn’t sure how to feel, mostly, he was just tired from his flight. He set his bags down and sighed dramatically and reluctantly walked back down the driveway to go collect his niece and nephews from Heinz.

The first thing he heard when he approached the was laughter. The yard was one of the few that didn’t have a fence, so the scene he came upon was rather spectacular. Heinz and the kids had the largest model train set winding through the back yard. Ferb and Phineas chased the antique train through the winding curves. Vanessa, Candace and a younger girl with a pink bow in her hair placed model buildings and people and trees around the tracks. Norm the android sat off to one side, the power cables for the train set running into the panel under the robot’s shirt. Heinz sat cross-legged next to Norm, a goofy engineer’s hat perched on his head and laughing with the kids.

A smile touched his face at the absurdity of it all, how could he be worried when everyone was having so much fun? He whistled and Ferb jumped over the tracks to tackled his leg. Phineas wasn’t far behind. “Uncle Perry!” Candace came last, but only because she didn’t cause a major derailment in her excitement.

“Perry? What are you doing here?” Heinz asked, abandoning his post at the controls. Vanessa and the other girl wandered over as well, probably just because they wanted to be part of the crowd.

“ _I just got back into the country and was looking for my niece and nephews._ ” He signed.

“Well, welcome back, Perry. Would you like to join us or have you come to break up the party?” Heinz asked, seeming just a little nervous. 

“ _I think we can continue, as long as the train is still okay._ ” He pointed at the overturned engine and Ferb rushed over to set it back on the tracks. Eventually all the kids went back to building up the towns around the tracks. He followed Heinz back to the controls and sat down in the grass with him. “ _Where did you get all this train stuff?_ ”

“Oh, I picked it up at the flea market. I mean, I had the one train since I was a child, but I just thought about expanding the set and got a little carried away. Norm makes a fine portable battery pack.” 

Perry nodded. “ _I was pretty upset with you when I got fired._ ”

“I’m really sorry about that, Perry. I wasn’t the one that fired you though. They fired all of my staff when I got kicked out of the company.” He frowned, but then the corner of his mouth turned up in a wry smirk. “But all the patents are in my name and it’ll be one heck of a court battle to let them use anything of mine without paying me a pretty penny.”

“ _So that’s it? You’re retired?_ ” He asked, because Heinz didn’t seem the type to give up his life’s work.

“Oh no. Not at all. Right now, though, I’m just taking it slow. Never know when the next big thing is going to hit. I mean, the rocket-powered jet skiff wasn’t invented in a day. It was more like three.” He cackled and started the trains up again, letting the little engine pull cars around the twisting track via the complex control panel he rigged up.

“ _Did you have a good time in Drusselstein?_ ” Perry asked, hoping that Heinz found what he was looking for. He seemed much calmer now than when he’d been working.

“Yes. We did. But I like Danville better.” Heinz fiddled with the train controls absently, taking half the panel apart and moving the wires around. “What about you? Linda mentioned you went skydiving and skiing and something called zorbing.”

“ _It’s riding down a hill in a giant inflatable ball. It’s fun._ ” Perry signed, then produced his phone to show Heinz pictures of various activities. 

“Wait, wait… Royal Air Force?” Heinz picked up on the uniform one of Perry’s friends was wearing. “You served?”

He nodded, “ _Two tours in Iraq. I’m a certified pilot and paratrooper._ ”

Heinz’s laughter startled him. Was it funny? He served his country and that was funny to Heinz? He lashed out a fist and punched the scientist in the upper arm, aiming for muscle instead of synthetic skin and titanium.

“Oww… ha ha… Perry the P-Paratrooper!” Heinz cackled out and fell over. 

Then it dawned on him that Heinz was busted up over Perry the Paratrooper and he face-palmed and gave into the giggle that built up, passing through his ruined voice box like an odd shuddering sigh. This man was infuriating. God, Perry thought, he’d missed him.


	11. Night Lights

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Perry lies awake with a conundrum.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another day, another chapter. Thanks again Revenblue and Maria Klassen for your support and ideas.

Months passed, the summer ended and the kids went back to school. Perry worked a few jobs, but none of them felt right. He ended up spending most of his time with Heinz, who turned his basement into a makeshift workshop. They never made anything useful, though Perry did write a translation program for Norm so the android could act as an ASL translator when no one else was around.

Linda had been dropping some subtle and not-so-subtle hints around Heinz, trying to play matchmaker and it wasn’t working. Either Heinz wasn’t interested in being anything more than friends or he was oblivious. And it was hard to imagine a man as brilliant as Heinz could be that oblivious. Perry lay awake again, trying desperately to think of a way to bring up his feeling to Heinz when he heard the approaching sirens.

Perry took this as a sign to get up and make himself a cuppa to calm down his racing thoughts. The red and blue flashing lights through the windows piqued his curiosity, so he slipped on a pair of sneakers and a hoodie and stepped outside. There was a cop car in front of their house, the lights on but sirens off. An ambulance and firetruck were blocking the rest of Maple Drive and Perry found himself rushing past emergency personnel to the Doofenshmirtz residence. The house was engulfed in flames, smoke billowing out the door where the firemen broke it down.

The door burst open and Norm marched out of the house with Vanessa cradled in his arms. The android was singed but repeating his instructions despite his clothes being on fire and his synthetic hair singed and melted. “Get Vanessa to safety. Get Vanessa to safety. Get Vanessa to safety.”

Paramedics rushed over to take the girl from the android. “Norm put me down!” She cried and the android obeyed.

Perry rushed over and signed furiously at Norm. “ _Where’s Heinz?_ ”

“Heinz Doofenshmirtz is in the upstairs master bedroom.” Norm replied helpfully and followed the paramedics and Vanessa.

There were too many cops and volunteer firefighters around for him to rush inside. Not to mention he had no protective gear whatsoever and he didn’t know where in the house Heinz was. As much as it pained him, he hung back behind the firetruck, waiting with the other neighbors that came out to watch. Vivian Garcia-Shapiro kept eyeing him and it was then that he realized he was only wearing a pair of flannel pajama pants and an open hoodie. He zipped his shirt up, if only to stop the woman from staring at his abs.

A fireball burst through the roof of the house, shaking the ground and Perry let out a silent cry. The firemen pulled back, the roof started to collapse and a smoky ball of something crashed through the living room window. The mass of dark cloth shifted and Heinz crawled out, his lab coat blackened and a gas mask over his face. He pulled Vanessa’s backpack off from where he’d worn it across his chest and Perry rushed over to him when he seemed unable to get the mask off his face.

Perry managed to get the gas mask off and let it drop to the ground. He knelt down next to him and tried to check him over, but was stopped by Heinz raising one of his hands. It was horrifying, like a prop out of one of the Terminator movies, the synthetic skin melted off, leaving twitching, malfunctioning articulated metal digits and acrid melted wiring. Perry could see some of the wires in Heinz’s wrist shorting out, casting sparks into mud of the yard.

“Van-essa?” He croaked.

Perry knelt down and signed slowly. “ _She’s with the paramedics._ ” He repeated the signs over and over until Heinz nodded in understanding. Where were the paramedics? When he looked around, they all stood back, watching Heinz with a mute horror. He sighed and went to help Heinz take his arms off, but the scientist pulled back.

“N-no. Too hot. Get burned.” He coughed and shifted, nudging the backpack towards Perry with his knee.

The firemen moved around them to continue to douse the house in foam and water. Perry forced the zipper of the backpack open to find Vanessa’s school books, a Mary McGuffin doll still in the box but a little squished, and a dozen DEI Squirrel batteries. Oh hell. Squirrel batteries had small amounts of pizzazium infinionite in them. Extreme heat and pizzazium infinionite equals instant explosion. Heinz must have forgotten one of the batteries and that’s when the house exploded. Maybe it was the one in the charger for his arms? 

Setting the backpack aside, he swiped a pair of unattended gloves from the fire truck and approached Heinz again. He couldn’t sign with the bulky gloves on, but he clapped the gloves together and pointed at Heinz’s arm. With a weak nod, Heinz gave his consent.

“Aaaaaaahh!” The wail that escaped Heinz’s mouth made Perry stop cold, unsure what he’d done to cause the other man to cry out so much.

“You gotta twist it the other way. To the left. Lefty Loosey.” Vanessa was wrapped in a blanket, back in Norm’s arms. She clung to the android’s neck and leaned over, obviously worried for her father.

Perry nodded and tried again, turning the arm the other way and it came off easier. One down, one to go. Perry moved over to the other arm and tried the same maneuver, but there was more resistance and Heinz’s whimpering made him realize something was wrong. At least now the paramedics seemed shocked out of their stupor long enough to come cut away the somewhat fire-resistant lab coat. Heinz sagged against Perry, half-conscious as an oxygen mask was secured around his head. 

Somehow, Perry ended up riding in the ambulance with Heinz and Vanessa; Vanessa curled up in Perry’s lap since Norm creeped everyone out. Heinz was admitted hours later with smoke inhalation and minor burns. He’d be released later that day.

Linda stopped by with some clothes for Vanessa and cookies for the nurses. Vanessa refused to leave. She also refused to let Perry leave for more than the time it took for him to go get food or go to the bathroom. At some time in the wee hours of the morning, Perry heard a weak groan from the hospital bed.

He leaned over and saw Heinz was awake. “P-perry the P-p-paramedic,” came the hoarse teasing.

“ _Glad you enjoyed that. How do you feel?_ ” Perry asked, making sure to sign within Heinz’s line of sight.

“Like I’ve been hit with a burning truck and gargled a broken bottle.” He shifted slightly to see Vanessa curled up against his right side and relaxed again. “Remind me not to test out a new invention like that again.”

“ _Is that what happened?_ ”

“No. That was just a happy coincidence that I had my new flame-retardant tarp tucked under my bed for storage.” Heinz sighed. “I suppose everyone will be talking about this now. Especially with that going on.” He nodded towards the TV hanging on the wall.

Perry turned up the volume on the TV.

“The final counts are in; the new mayor of Danville is Roger Doofenshmirtz. This news comes a little bittersweet this morning as his brother, famed inventor Dr. Heinz Doofenshmimrtz’s house burnt down in what is suspected to be arson. And now, for the weather!”

Arson? Who in the world would want to kill Heinz? He was harmless.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: Flame-resistant means that a material doesn't melt or burst into flames when exposed to fire compared to non-treated materials.
> 
> Flame-retardant means that a material doesn't catch on fire or puts out flames.


	12. Rock

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heinz, Vanessa and Perry head to the Doofenschmirtz vacation condo to regroup after the fire.

Vanessa tugged on his sleeve, bouncing up and down while Perry opened the door of the vacation home for them. “Bathroom!” She ran inside and to the bathroom, causing the two men to laugh.

“I told you she couldn’t handle the large soda,” Heinz shot Perry a look and the man at least had the decency to look guilty.

“ _Fine, fine._ ” He signed absently and headed out to the car to fetch Norm and the bags of new clothes Heinz and Vanessa bought on the way up to lake house. It was a nice enough place, much better than trying to live out of a hotel room while their house was completely rebuilt. Especially with the arson investigation going on. Right now, he didn’t want to think about that.

Heinz bumped the light switch with his shoulder and slipped off his sandals and flopped down on the couch. Vanessa came back downstairs, clutching her Mary McGuffin doll and climbed up beside him. “Feel better?”

She nodded. “Where’s Perry?” She asked, worried for a minute.

“He’s outside with Norm,” he answered, worried that the fire scarred his daughter for life. But she was a brave kid, the only thing she seemed to want now was to be close to her father and Perry. He was an amazing help now that Heinz’s prosthetics were ruined and he wasn’t healed up enough to use his spares.

“Is he going to stay with us?” She asked, stretching out on the couch and dropping her feet in his lap.

“For a little while, yes.” He wondered what Vanessa thought of the arrangement. It was strange how easy Perry became his best friend. On the surface, they didn’t seem to have much in common, but Perry was a good listener and loyal and intelligent but in the way that he didn’t seem like a show off.

“Translation not found, Perry Fletcher! Would you like to add that to my vocabulary?” Norm helpfully shouted as he walked through the door. The ASL program was still in an early state, anything not in the vocabulary database had to be manually taught to the android. Most of them were name signs, the occasional port from British Sign Language that Perry sometimes uses and swear words. Heinz wondered what sort of rude language Perry was teaching his innocent AI.

Bags were deposited on the floor and Perry dropped onto the couch beside Heinz. “ _Your robot needs to be taught how to unload a car without taking one thing at a time_.”

“We’ll work on that,” Heinz glanced over to his android. “Norm, power down for a while. We don’t have a charger set up yet.”

“Okay! Powering down!” The android slumped down in the corner. He needed some touch-ups, but he survived the fire well. He needed a new hairpiece, but otherwise most of the damage was cosmetic.

“Dad can we watch a movie?” Vanessa asked. How could anyone say no to those blue eyes?

“Sure, go put something on while Perry and I put things away.” He got up and lead Perry upstairs to the bedrooms to show Perry around and direct where things should go. “Sorry to make you carry all the bags… Perry the Pack mule.” He grinned, thinking that was one of his cleverer Perry Puns.

“ _Why do you always do that?_ ” Perry signed and set Heinz’s duffle bag on the bed.

“I don’t know, I’ll stop if you don’t like it. I just thought it was funny.” He shrugged a little, watching Perry for signs that his teasing went too far. He’d never been the best at dealing with people. Especially when it came to people that weren’t around him because of his money or brains or some other obligation.

“ _No, it’s okay. Some of them are funny._ ” Perry smiled a little bit.

“Only some of them?” he whined but was relieved. Heinz flopped face-down on the bed; he felt… helpless. The prototype fire-retardant tarp he’d used in his dramatic escape kept him mostly safe. The damage came from when he pushed through the burning rubble, ignoring the pain from the feedback sensors as they overloaded. The titanium skeletal structures in the arms heated, melting the wiring and synthetic skin, burning him where the prosthetics connected. He wasn’t supposed to use his prosthetics until the skin healed.

But that wasn’t what made him feel the worst. Someone burnt his house down while he and Vanessa slept. He hadn’t felt this threatened since he left Drusselstein to come to America with no money and no plan for his future. The only thing that mitigated the helplessness was Perry’s calming presence. He never had anyone like that he could depend on before.

Perry clicked his tongue and Heinz rolled over to watch him sign. “ _Are you okay?_ ”

“You know Perry, you’re the best thing that happened to me since Vanessa was born.” He’s not sure why he said that. He certainly means it, but he didn’t mean to just blurt it out like that. But now that it’s out there, he doesn’t want to take it back.

“ _That can’t be true._ ” Perry signs uncertainly, chewing on his bottom lip. Heinz wasn’t sure he’d ever seen such a nervous expression on the younger man’s face.

“Have I ever lied to you?” And he hasn’t. Never. 

Perry shook his head and sat down on the bed next to him. He opened his mouth and ruined it. He was such a _dummkopf_!

“Perry the Perplexed? Or Perry the Pissed Off?” The lack of reaction was worrying, so Heinz threw his legs up in the air and down to propel himself to a sitting position. Perry’s strong hands caught him, steadying him before he accidentally pitched himself to the floor. His chest tightened a little and started to pull away from Perry’s strong hands. 

Perry’s lips were suddenly on his and all thought left his brain. The kiss seemed to stop time. Or at least it felt like time had shuddered to a screeching halt. He sighed when Perry pulled back. “ _I wanted to do that for a while now._ ”

“Really? Well I wish I knew that months ago.” He imagined the trip to Drusselstein would have been less of him moping around and much more fun with Perry.

A rough, soundless laugh erupted from the younger man and Heinz laughed too, the tension melting out of them. “ _You didn’t seem interested._ ”

“To be fair, I’m pretty catastrophic to relationships.” He joked, though there was truth to it. Charlene, Vanessa’s mother, couldn’t stand him and left when Vanessa was barely a year old. He had theories on the subject, but he didn’t like to dwell on his own faults too much. 

“ _Me too, but I’m willing to try,_ ” Perry signed with a smile.

“Yeah, Yeah I’d like that.” He said and Perry pulled him into another kiss.

“Oh my God! Are you kissing?”

Perry practically leapt away from him, leaving Heinz to crash to the floor on his ass. Vanessa stood uncertainly in the doorway. “Vanessa, we… uh…”

“You’ve been up here forever, I turned Norm on to order some pizza.” She turned and headed down the stairs. “You’re missing the movie!”

Perry seemed frozen, his face still red from getting caught. Heinz stood up and gently kicked him. “Come on, we’re missing the movie. And dinner apparently.” Vanessa was a wonderfully smart girl, using Norm to order food. He was going to have to put some parent locks on the android, and then maybe have a talk with her to see if she really was okay with Perry being around in a more boyfriend role.

Heinz sat down on the couch and Vanessa moved to drape her feet over his legs. Perry sat on his other side and wrapped an arm around his shoulders. 

He could get used to this.


	13. The Visit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Being mayor isn't all it's cracked up to be, and Roger still can't say no to his mother.

Roger leaned back in his new chair, enjoying the feel of power that just sitting in his office in City Hall gave him. Danville wasn’t a very large city, and it didn’t have many problems. Being mayor was less interesting than he imagined. Not exactly the thing he expected to launch his political career.

DEI wasn’t doing as well as he hoped with Aloyse von Roddenstein at the head of the R&D department. He was good, but not as good as Heinz. Plus, the stock dropped more than he expected when Heinz was let go. He stood up and looked out the window. At least the military contacts were helping with the current profit loss. Or at least they bought more time. Heinz’s notes on the AI were… strange and scattered. Like during that all-nighter, he changed some things and didn’t bother to write them down.

And somehow the lawyers let him keep the damn prototype, so they didn’t have the original to reverse engineer. Now they had a dumb AI and several android bodies, but the software crashes as soon as they are uploaded to the bodies. And the contracts were for robotic soldiers that could be trained as shock troops. Monogram was on board with helping to recover the robot. The man’s operative, a small Chinese-American known only as “Peter”, delivered a copy of the prototype’s hard drive. The fire was not Roger’s idea though. The thought that Heinz or Vanessa could have been killed worried him.

Heinz might have been blocking his career by not letting him run the company as it should be run, but he didn’t want the man dead. In fact, he wanted Heinz to like him again. He wanted Heinz and Vanessa to come to Christmas dinner at Mother’s; though now maybe Roger will host it at the lovely mayor’s mansion instead of Mother’s small apartment. Heinz was always distant, running away from the people that love him. It’ll only be time before he abandons Vanessa too.

Not that it’s Heinz’s fault. There have been unreliable men throughout the family. Father was one of them, only loving that ill-gotten dog and horrible gnome that kept getting misplaced all the time. Nothing was ever good enough for Father, not even Mother, who was an all-star kickball player and would have gone pro if she hadn’t fallen for the drunk gambler. Roger has his theories, but he’s sure Heinz is a bastard, the dates are fuzzy when he covertly asked around. Heinz’s own stories made even less sense involving gnomes and ocelots, likely an escape from being poor and too smart for the public-school system in Gimmelshtump. 

“Roger!” He turned to see his mother standing in his office holding a covered container. 

“Mother!” He smiled and crossed the office to hug her. 

She wandered around his office and deposited the container on his desk. “This is a very lovely office, Roger.”

He knows she’s here for a reason other than bringing him lunch. “Where is Heinz?”

“He’s at his lake house, why?” He asked, wondering if she’s going to try yet another reconciliation with her first-born.

“Am I not allowed to know where my son and only grandchild are?” She asked and inspected every inch of his desk.

“He took Vanessa to the lake house.” He sighed. The vacation home technically belonged to DEI, but Roger wasn’t going to be that petty. He didn’t want his brother and niece to be homeless, so he made sure that nobody in the company would have problems letting Heinz stay there as long as he needed to.

“Well, since you are not busy, Roger, you should take me there.” She said in that tone that makes it difficult to argue.

The drive was long, but not tedious. The trees were still clinging to their leaves, gold and orange and browns. They arrived mid-afternoon, just enough time to park behind the white sports car with yellow stripe. Funny, it didn’t seem like the car Heinz would drive.

Roger puzzled over the car while his mother approached the door and knocked.

“I’ll get it!” He heard Heinz shout and open the door. He looked better than Roger expected, dressed in jeans and a black long-sleeved shirt, wearing a pair of older model arms with fingers that still clicked when he moved them. “Mother… Roger… what are you doing here?”

“To make sure you are alright,” Mother somehow pushed her way inside, leaving Heinz to bar Roger from entering for a long moment. Eventually, he gave in and followed their mother inside. “I brought some food, to keep your strength up.”

“I’m fine, I don’t need strength. Or food. There’s plenty of food here.” He sounded annoyed, tired, and the dark circles under his eyes were a telltale sign that Heinz was close to the edge. He was likely going to do something very rash soon.

“I know, but I needed to make sure you were okay.” Mother switched to German and turned the oven on for the dubious casserole. Roger loved his mother, but her cooking left much to be desired.

“If you needed to know so badly, why did it take two weeks for you to come?” Heinz asked, watching the both of them as if they were intruders.

“I did not know where you were. I had to wait until Roger’s schedule was free to bring me to you.” She replied in a tone that left no argument. Roger bristled at the lie, but Heinz was being unreasonable in his paranoia.

“Where’s Vanessa?” Roger asked, trying to cut the tension. It was uncomfortable in there, and not because of the smell of the cabbage casserole.

“She’s with Perry, visiting his family that lives near here.” Heinz mumbled, the fingers on his right prosthetic jerking sporadically.

“Who is Perry?” Their mother asked, her face set in a more stern and judgmental expression than Roger had seen in a long time.

“He’s my… friend.” Heinz folded his arms in front of him. “He’s been helping us out since the fire.”

Roger hummed at Heinz’s hesitation. The man was a terrible liar, so this Perry must be more than a friend. Especially if he was taking Vanessa places. There were very few people he trusted with his daughter, and the fact that this man took her to a family gathering was very telling. 

Roger was probably the only person that knew why Heinz and Charlene couldn’t make things work: Heinz just wasn’t attracted to women. The accident of Vanessa’s birth had been a one night stand at a technology convention and Charlene was more focused on her career than being a mother. Heinz gladly tool sole custody, Vanessa was his whole world, and he’d never really dated anyone since. 

If Heinz was going to do something rash, Vanessa might be left with this stranger. There had to be something he could do. Roger kept silent during the awkward meal while Heinz barely acknowledged their mother’s presence as he ate everything put in front of him. Once the meal was choked down, Heinz washed the dish and handed it to Roger, signaling the end of the interaction. “We should go before it gets dark, Mother.”


	14. Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Perry walks into an odd meeting, Heinz just gets angry.

Perry returned to the lake house with Vanessa later that evening. He opened the door to see Heinz laying on the couch, a pillow over his face. Vanessa headed upstairs to her room, tired from running around with Candace and the boys.

He tried to make some noise to wake Heinz naturally, not wanting to shake him awake. He tried that before to varying results, but most of the time Heinz woke startled and kicking. He opened the front door again and all but slammed it closed, which caused Heinz to jerk awake and look around the room. “Perry! What time is it?”

“ _Six, you okay?_ ” 

“Oh, yeah. Mother and Roger stopped by with ‘lunch’. I honestly wonder how Roger didn’t starve to death growing up. Her cooking is just awful.” Heinz ran artificial fingers through his hair and let out a yawn. “How was your visit?”

“ _It was nice. Vanessa had a good time. Everyone asked about you._ ” Perry signed, sitting down next to his boyfriend.

“We could have a barbeque tomorrow, since they’ll still be in town.” Heinz suggested.

He was constantly surprised how well things were going. His entire family was perfectly alright with he and Heinz dating. Even Linda’s parents, who were always a bit awkward around him, were fine. He wondered if Heinz told his family about them, then quickly tossed that aside. Heinz wouldn’t give them the time of day if he could help it. And if his mother was as insensitive as Roger was, then maybe it’s best that they keep the Doofenshmirtzes out of the loop.

“ _That’s a great idea, I’ll text Linda._ ” Perry smiled and leaned against Heinz’s shoulder and tangling his fingers with Heinz’s. Though this set of arms didn’t have the realistic feedback sensors in it, Perry did the gesture anyway; Heinz always seemed to appreciate it. 

The next afternoon arrived fast in a flurry of Flynns, Fletchers and a Flynn-Fletcher as the whole clan descended on the Doofenshmirtz house with more than enough food to feed an army. Heinz bounced around the kitchen, likely grateful for something to do, directing Betty Jo and Linda in making side-dishes while Lawrence and Clyde fired up the grill. Perry’s job was attempting to keep an eye on the kids while making sure the grill didn’t spontaneously combust. 

The burgers and hot dogs were well on their way to being done when Betty Jo scurried out of the house and gave him a shove towards the back door. “Go in there. Your man is going to have some kind of fit with a woman from the city.”

He raised his eyebrows in question, but Betty Jo shooed him inside. He liked the woman well enough, but he hadn’t really been around enough to grasp more than basic signs. He found Heinz and Linda with an older woman, her hair streaked with gray and pulled back in a severe bun. Heinz had one arm crossed around his chest and the other pressed against his mouth, but he looked worried. Linda stood close, her frown and the set of her brow holding back her obvious irritation.

“I don’t see why child protective services are needed here. I thought that the police were still investigating the case as arson,” Heinz hummed in a dry tone, a neutral professional mask hiding his real feelings. 

“Yes well, during the investigation, the police found some materials in your house that cause some concern. The explosion was caused by one of those squirrel-type batteries. The report says there were about a dozen on site. How did you get so many?” The woman reads off her charts and watches the scientist.

“I invented them,” Heinz said simply, “I’m an inventor. Honestly, you can purchase more pizzazium infinionite at the Superduper Mega Superstore than are in a dozen of those batteries combined. There’s more dangerous stuff under the typical household sink than a dozen batteries.”

“Mister Doofenshmirtz-” 

“Doctor Doofenshmirtz, actually.” Heinz cut her off quickly, his tone laced with annoyance. 

“Doctor Doofenshmirtz, you have to see what this looks like: you are unemployed and disabled, your family members do not assist you in any way, and your house burnt down under mysterious circumstances. We’re just concerned with Vanessa’s safety and wellbeing.” The woman stated, as if she believed she were doing good here. “I’ll need to talk to Vanessa alone.”

“No.” Heinz said, shaking his head. “I’m unemployed, yes, but I receive royalties on several patents that I own, and have quite a lot of money, enough that Vanessa and I can live comfortably without me actually holding a traditional job ever again. And that includes if she wants to go to an Ivy League college when she graduates high school. Unemployed yes, but financially stable.” 

He held up his left hand, thumb out and raised his index finger to join it. “I am disabled, but I am capable of caring for my daughter. I don’t let my mother watch her alone because my mother verbally and emotionally abused me as a child and I don’t think she should be left alone with Vanessa. Roger is just terrible with kids, since he treats them all like they are mentally deficient.” 

He added his middle finger to his count, “There is an ongoing investigation into the fire, and until it is actually proven that I burnt my own house down for some reason or other then we have no business with you. So, I’m asking you to leave my home. You can contact my lawyer if you feel the need to press charges or whatever it is you are trying to do here.”

The woman left in a huff with Linda following her out, making sure that the intruder left the property. Perry wrapped his arms around Heinz’s shoulders, gathering him in for a hug. After a while, Heinz relaxed against Perry, letting out a deep sigh. “I won’t let them take Vanessa.”

Perry freed his hands so he could sign back, “ _I won’t let them take her either. And neither will Linda and Lawrence. If they come, we’ll fight them._ ”

“I love you Perry, you’re my rock,” Heinz murmured into Perry’s ear and kissed him quickly.

Perry could feel his face turn red as soon as he saw the flash from Linda’s phone capturing the moment. “You two are so cute!” She practically squealed the way Candace does when that boy band is on TV.

He huffs dramatically and made a crude gesture that he knew Linda understood, but she just laughed at him and headed outside to check on the food. He’s not cute, he’s a grown man that just happened to be hugging Heinz so tight he could imagine easily slipping him into a sleeper hold. He Didn't, just eased up a little so Heinz could straighten himself up a little. 

“ _What’s going on down there?_ ” Perry took Heinz’s left wrist and saw that his fingers were still in the count he’d done for that social services woman.

“Ugh, lost the connection to my fingers. They’re stuck.” He sighed. “I can’t wait until my new arms get here.” 

Perry gently straightened the rest of his fingers, pulling them into a more natural position. 

“What would I ever do without you?”

“ _You’d probably have your fingers stuck in a rude gesture._ ” Perry grinned.

“No, that’d be you!” Heinz laughed and bumped his shoulder. “Let’s see if there are any burgers left.”


	15. Plans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Perry contemplates life. Heinz has a big idea.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay. I jinxed myself by saying "I'm usually very unreliable with updating!" But I think I got over my momentary writer's block.

Christmas snuck up on them all. The investigation into the fire ended up inconclusive. No suspects were named, but Perry had an idea when the latest news report showed the military buying several “autonomous soldier androids” from DEI. They looked suspiciously like Norm but with a more severe look on their faces and no hair. Further videos posted on the Internet showed the androids acting a bit like Norm, but clumsier, as if their software had been limited somehow.

Heinz was spending more and more time in his basement workshop and on the phone with his lawyer, though he refused to talk about what he was planning. Oh well, he’d find out soon enough that it wasn’t worth sneaking around for. Besides, he was pretty sure that Heinz had something planned to present his latest scheme. Hell, the man had a whole song and dance number when he and Perry slept beside each other the first time. 

The former secret agent stared at his computer screen, he was so bored these days. Not that he didn’t love living with Heinz and spending most of his extra time with his nephews and niece and Vanessa, but he wanted something a bit more than that out of life. And he already attempted applying for the police academy, but communication was an issue. Talking was a big part of the job. While he technically had a degree in computer science, he wasn’t too thrilled with using it. He knew the theory but he just didn’t quite get how to write code as elegant as Heinz’s. The hackjob he’d done to Norm’s ASL program was proof enough.

He flopped on the couch, his legs draped over the couch arm and his hands folded behind his head. He stared at the ceiling for a long while and let out a frustrated grunt, the most sound he could manage these days. He closed his eyes when the ceiling offered him no answers.

The air escaped his chest violently as the sudden force landed on his abdomen. He lashed out before he was fully awake but froze when his eyes landed on the red hair of Phineas bouncing happily on top of him. “Hi Perry!” Ferb stood beside them, leaning over, a slight worried look in his eye because he almost hit Phineas after being startled awake.

He leveled a stern glare at the kid, “ _What did I say about waking me up?_ ” He’d never been a heavy sleeper, but years in the military and learning to sleep in war zones made him rather tricky to wake. Linda and Lawrence made sure the kids were careful, but Phineas was prone to forgetting when he was excited.

“Oh! Not to startle you. Whoops! Sorry.” Phineas looked apologetic for a moment before his attention span ran out and he couldn’t hold back what he wanted to say. “Dr. D said we could play with him today but he’s on the phone!”

It was hard to stay mad at the youngest Flynn, his personality was downright infectious. Perry lifted the child off his diaphragm and set him on the floor beside his brother. “ _Come on, let’s see what’s happening in the workshop?_ ”

The boys laughed and ran after him but thankfully they slowed going down the basement steps. Once downstairs, Perry guided the boys to the workshop, knocking on the wall so Heinz would know they were there. He turned and smiled, waving at them as he finished his phone conversation in rapid German. Perry only caught every few words, and out of context mixed with Drusselstenian slang made the conversation rather difficult to follow.

Heinz cradled the old cordless phone between his ear and shoulder and signed at them. “ _I’ll be another minute, take a seat at the workbench._ ” He gestured to them to the table set up under the bank of lights. Perry helps both boys up onto the tall stools and in front of the vast array of crafting supplies. What was Heinz up to now?

The quirky scientist returned and grinned at the three of them. “Alright boys, your mission today is to design a school. I want you to build a model of what you think a school would look like.” 

Phineas lit up like a spotlight and climbed onto the table, gathering supplies. He wasted no time in dictating ideas to Ferb, who dutifully listened while his younger brother drew out some blueprints in crayon.

“ _What’s this for?_ ” Perry signed to Heinz while the boys were occupied.

Heinz moved around the table to Perry’s side and looped an arm around him, pulling him close. He whispered so the boys wouldn’t hear. “I’m starting a school. Not like… a real school but… a center for science and arts, for children that want to learn more than what the public schools can teach them. Afterschool programs, summer activities.”

“ _Why?_ ” Not that Perry disagreed with the idea. He thought it was a great idea, especially for kids like Phineas and Ferb that got bored with ‘traditional’ daycare and classes and ended up causing trouble for overworked teachers that didn’t know how to deal with gifted children.

“Because I’m bored and I have a lot of money and I think it’ll really help. I was a terrible student,” Heinz explained, walking Perry away from the table so they could speak without bothering the creative process. “Textbooks got boring, they never covered the questions I had. And asking the teachers never helped because they just wanted to get through the day and go home. And the other kids always picked on me for asking questions and it was just this whole huge thing.” He sighed and shook his head. “I worked very hard to make up for the years I missed while I ran away to the circus. I even skipped a grade while I was at it. I was all but done with high school when I… when I left Drusselstein.”

Perry nods, he still didn’t know what prompted Heinz to flee his country, but he figured that was a rather traumatic story and better left for another time. “ _Are you sure about this? It seems like… like a lot of work. And the boys are designing it for you?_ ”

“Oh that, well, I figured I’d get some input from actual children. Vanessa already gave me tons of ideas, but I think I need input from a wider selection of children, otherwise it wouldn’t be as helpful. And I’m very sure. I think I’d like being a teacher.” Heinz tightened his hold on Perry, giving him a squeeze but not making his hold tight enough that he couldn’t escape.

“ _I wish I had my life figured out like you do._ ” Perry signed, chewing his bottom lip as he watched Ferb construct the outer walls of the building out of cardboard and construction paper.

“Well, what did you want to be when you were their age?” Heinz asked, curious to find something out about his somewhat secretive boyfriend.

“ _James Bond_ ” 

“Really Perry? A spy? Which part did you want to aspire to? The stopping supervillains with high tech gadgets or sleeping with every sexy woman that you came across?” Heinz teased.

Perry felt his cheeks turn a bit red. “ _The first part! I just want to… to help people. But I keep getting turned down. The military won’t take me, the police academy, fireman, nobody will take a man that can’t talk._ ” He huffed, his irritation making his signs sharp and more forceful than he really meant.

“If it’ll make you feel better, I can build some sort of… death ray…inator… and you could foil my evil plans,” Heinz suggested.

“ _Now you’re making fun of me_.”

“You don’t really need a job, you know. Of course, then people will think you’re just with me because of my money.” Heinz laughed. “You’re thinking too hard. Just relax and something will come to you.”

Perry sighed and leaned against his crazy boyfriend. “ _Yeah, you’re probably right_.”

Together they watched the two brothers construct their dream school.


	16. Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A sleepless night with Heinz and Perry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took so long. I lost all my notes and my document files for this story and then got super busy with work and real life things. Recently I reread this and felt that I finally was ready to try to get this story back on track.

Heinz sat in the dark, reading the letter over and over again with the scant light from the driveway light spilling in through the window. Perry snored soundly beside him, oblivious to the inner turmoil that kept the older man awake into the early hours of morning. He pushed the letter aside with his foot and sighed, slipping out of bed and quietly put his arms on. The new arms were a touch lighter and quieter as they calibrated. He experimentally flexed the fingers once and snatched the letter, retreating downstairs to the kitchen so he wouldn’t wake his boyfriend.

Boyfriend.

The word sounded so… silly. Juvenile. But Perry was… he was… family. Even though it was true, it still sounded like a cheesy line in a sappy romance movie. Heinz shook his head and passed the laundry room, snatching a clean t-shirt from the pile. It wasn’t until he was in the kitchen that he realized the shirt was one of Perry’s. “You got it bad, Heinz,” the scientist shook his head and tossed the offending letter on the table. He didn’t understand what the younger man saw in him. But he didn’t doubt Perry’s choices, they were both adults and Heinz was in a healthy enough place to think that things might go well. Even though the letter mocked him from three feet away.

He heaved a sigh and started pulling out the ingredients for almond brittle. It would give him something else to focus on for a few minutes. So focused on not burning the butter and sugar concoction, he hadn’t noticed his ex-military man was behind him until the younger man wrapped his arms around Heinz, resting his chin on the taller man’s shoulder. Heinz smiled, knowing Perry had to stand on his toes to reach. He glanced down to Perry’s hands. 

“ _What are you making?_ ” The hands signed from the slightly awkward angle.

“Almond brittle. Shoo, you’ll distract me, and it’ll burn.” He shrugged a shoulder to dislodge the younger man, who relocated. Heinz heard the rustle of paper, but he didn’t turn until he poured the brittle mixture into a pan and stuck it in the freezer. Once that task was done, he took a deep breath and faced Perry.

“ _Heinz… what is this?_ ” Perry signed and waved the letter, a concerned frown on his face.

“I’m being sued for custody of Vanessa.” He pressed his back against the cool refrigerator. “Charlene wants sole custody.”

He saw the angry look cross Perry’s face and was glad he had the man’s unwavering support.

“Last I heard, she had a job with some international company and was working on her career. She didn’t even respond when I sent her pictures, but… I don’t know… now all of a sudden, she wants Vanessa? As if the last ten years didn’t matter.” He paced around the kitchen. “I mean, I know I was in a bad place when we hooked up, but I mean… why now of all times?” 

“ _You’ve been in the news a lot lately. The company letting you go, the fire. Maybe she’s concerned? Maybe you should meet with her to sort things out?_ ” Perry suggested, trying to seem optimistic. 

“I’m just worried, Perry, first that social services woman and now this. What if it’s all some sort of conspiracy? Do you think Roger is behind this? He’s wanted me gone for a while now.” He tried not to spiral but he couldn’t help it. Roger had been after him since that day on the mountain trail.

Perry snapped his fingers, causing Heinz to refocus. “ _Don’t jump to conclusions, Heinz. Better to just meet with Charline and your lawyers to sort it out. I’ll even go with you if you like._ ”

Heinz smiled and nodded. “Yes, of course you’ll come. Vanessa adores you and I want you around for as long as you’ll have us.” Wait. What? Did he just… that sounded an awful lot like… He covered his eyes with his hands, groaning at the failure of his brain to mouth filter. “Perry just… just forget I said that. That’s… it’s late and I’m tired.” He finally cracked one eye open at Perry’s shuddering laughter.

“ _Heinz, that’s sweet._ ” His hands said before stilling, a thoughtful look on his face. “ _I don’t expect anything that we’re all not ready for. But I’ll fight with you. Linda and Lawrence too. We all know how good of a Father you are._ ”

“Thank you, Perry. I love you.” He stepped closer to Perry and leaned down to kiss the top of his head, enjoying the feel of his sleep mussed teal hair.

“ _Love you too,_ ” Perry signed, leaning back into Heinz. 

Heinz yawned, comfortable as he stood there in the quiet kitchen. “Do you want to um…”

“ _Do you want to go back to bed?_ ” Perry asked as he stood, helpfully making sure Heinz didn’t topple over. Heinz had always been clumsy, but Perry didn’t seem to mind that at all and he was glad that his boyfriend kept him on his feet. Literally.

“I do but… do you think we can…?” He stumbled through the question, still feeling awkward and self-conscious, even though Perry saw him naked a few times by accident. He felt his face go red and shook his head. 

“ _Do you want to fuck?_ ” Perry signed, a cheeky grin lighting up his face.

“PERRY! That’s so vulgar!” He raised his voice, then remembered Vanessa was still asleep in her room and lowered his voice again. “Now I don’t know if I want to.” He pouted, though internally he was glad that Perry had been so blunt. 

“ _Well if you don’t want to fuck, I could give you a blow job._ ” Perry signed and Heinz felt his blood rush away from his face.

“Peeeerrrrrry…” Heinz whined, both embarrassed and turned on. 

The younger man tugged Heinz up the stairs, to their shared bedroom and shut the door. “ _Do you want to keep your arms on?_ ”

“Yes, please. I want to touch you.” Heinz said softly, glad that Perry even considered the options. He still wasn’t very comfortable around Perry without his arms, but Perry was patient and thoughtful and never made Heinz feel inadequate.

His boyfriend’s strong arms wrapped around him and they shared a kiss, slow at first that somehow turned intense. It wasn’t until they came up for air that Heinz realized they were both on the bed. Perry tugged on the borrowed t-shirt and Heinz raised his arms, only getting the shirt a little caught on his nose. They laughed, but somehow it didn’t ruin the mood.

“You didn’t want to tear off my clothes?” Heinz grinned as Perry knelt over him.

“ _That’s my favorite shirt. I’m not ruining it even if it is to get you naked._ ” Perry signed quickly before Heinz found himself in another kiss.

Usually, Heinz’s mind was full of things, inventions, worries, tasks that needed to be done, things he liked to ponder, but when he was this close to Perry, it was like it all quieted down. His mind relaxed and he didn’t have to think so hard all the time. He just had to run his artificial fingers along Perry’s very fine abs, enjoying the shiver of the younger man as he tugged down his sweatpants. He wished he could touch him with real fingers but pushed that thought aside as he leaned forward and kissed Perry’s stomach, eliciting a strange sort of purr from the mute.

“Perry… well, I know you promised me, but maybe I’d better take care of you first?” He tried to sound sexy, but his warbling voice didn’t quite make the transition. But it didn’t matter, Perry enthusiastically nodded, making pleased sounds as Heinz explored lower.

The next morning, Heinz woke, his shoulder sore from sleeping with his arm on and his OCD telling him he really needed to wash the sheets today. But he couldn’t bring himself to stop cuddling next to his teal-haired lover, their legs tangled together and a sense of contentment filling him. He had so much to do. So much to prepare for… but it could all wait just another hour. And he drifted back to sleep with his head comfortably resting against Perry’s chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry about the fade to black there. I don't write lemons well and I figure anything you might imagine might be better than my words about Heinz and Perry's sexytimes.


End file.
